A Thorn For Every Heart

A Thorn For Every Heart: Things Aren't So Beautiful NowThings Aren't So Beautiful Now (2004)
Universal Music Group

Reviewer Rating: 1

Contributed by: InaGreendaseBrian
(others by this writer | submit your own)
Published on January 7th 2005I could probably piss off a whole lot of you right now by not neccessarily lumping this band in with the "new" breed of this type of "music," but rather labeling it with a certain, not-so-necessarily vague title. And while I'd love to use it and thus clear a whole lot of text in this review, saving .

I could probably piss off a whole lot of you right now by not neccessarily lumping this band in with the "new" breed of this type of "music," but rather labeling it with a certain, not-so-necessarily vague title. And while I'd love to use it and thus clear a whole lot of text in this review, saving the both of us precious time, I really can't, as I admittedly enjoy a fair slew of bands playing whatever you'd like to call what A Thorn For Every Heart calls home to. But even Things Aren't So Beautiful Now is so badly clichéd and near-parodical, it's sort of pathetic and almost brings me to the point of slapping it with the somewhat unfair tag.

Take a less melodic Yellowcard, drag the tempo, thrown in unnecessary screaming, and voila - crap!

I expect a certain level of competency and efficiency when it comes to major label-issued full-lengths regardless of the band. Although ATFEH certainly meet these expectations, their proper debut is so laughable and predictable that it throws any redeeming qualities the band still possesses right out the proverbial window. Ironically, upon listening, i contemplated throwing myself out of an actual window.

While there's concrete evidence on this medium called the Internet that I guiltily enjoy(ed) some aspects of the band's previously released, now out-of-print Silence Is Golden EP, from the oddly-fit use of the violin to the horrendously infectious nature of one or two song choruses, none of it has carried over. It isn't necessarily a good or bad thing the band removed their violinist, as there's a couple tracks that do still use the strings, but its horrifically melodramatic nature makes no sense whatsoever. The band couldn't even capture any of the "magic" the EP carried, rerecording five songs that make up half the full-length itself. Especially slaughtered is "Next Of Kin," drained of all the energy and passion (seriously) the original version had. Seeing as how the EP was an official release and not a demo, it's safe to say that the bullshit antics the band pull here should disappoint even their own fans with the lack of new material on Beautiful....

The effects the vocals have on them are ridiculous, too. The album's title track, part 2, ahem, takes some sort of keyboard fade, shadowing the vocals for almost the entire last minute. To further describe how terrible it sounds is to propel an exercise in futility.

Blandness, overproduction, whiny/laughably screamed vocal stylings, and sophomoric songwriting capabilites are all qualities easily found on Things Aren't So Beautiful Now, an album that gets progressively worse as it goes along. Kudos to the band, however, for giving sufficient warning with such a name.

STREAM
99 With An Anchor
February
Things Aren't So Beautiful Now (Part 2)

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Fine Print: The following comments are owned by whoever posted them. We are not respon sible for them in any way. Seriously.

stafco (February 10, 2007)

i havent listened to the whole album, so i cant necisearilly judge it.
i have though listened to 'February' 'Pretty When You Cry' and 'Things Aren't So Beautiful Now (part two).
personally, i like things arent so beautiful now part two, basically because it shows the story of love and then younge death, and that had on effect on me because that is my greatest fear right now.
other then that the rest is pretty ordinarry.

Anonymous (April 11, 2006)

It's nothing incrediable but i think the review is a little harsh. This is a debut and they still need time to get it together. They have a decent live show and the album is far from horrible. It just isn't that good either...mediocre.

Anonymous (January 1, 2006)

i dont know about the rest of their songs, but "things aren't so beautiful part 2" is frigggin awesome. everyone who disses them, go screw yourself. just because a band has good lyrics, doesn't mean they have to diss them. and their band name means the exact opposite of every rose has it's thorn. that means every good thing has it's bad. a thorn for every heart is basically saying for everyone you love, it's possible to get hurt more. yeah that's emo, but that's not what this band is about. everyone's judging this band on their name, how about you shut the fuck up and LISTEN to their songs

BlackSheepBoy (September 30, 2005)

I could not agree with the reviewer more. Nothing but bland and hackneyed material here. In the "AP's 100 to Watch," the lead singer claims "I write real stuff. I don't bullshit anybody." After reading that, being a former owner of this album, I nearly perished laughing.

Anonymous (July 4, 2005)

i think that they r gr8, 'pretty when you cry' kix the ass and i think that everyone should give them a fuken break n open up your ears.
*kirst* xxx

Anonymous (June 15, 2005)

Album 10. Review 0. You are so WRONG that it makes me want to NOT support your worthy charities. . . .and it makes me wonder why you wrote it since it's the most truly good music I've heard in years that gets better the more you hear it, unlike so many "pop" songs that get boring after awhile. That's how I KNOW it's good and YOU'RE wrong. . . .

Anonymous (May 2, 2005)

this album was great, you're all a bunch of haters

courtney_earle (April 23, 2005)

A.K.A "A Thorn For Every Fag"

Anonymous (March 22, 2005)

the name isnt that bad.

and the music is pretty good too.

how about you guys comment on bands you like instead of pissing on bands you dont. no one gives a sh1t whether you think its good or not. people can like what they want and if you dont like what they do then you can suck a f^ck.

istapledmyfoot (January 12, 2005)

"if this sounds like 'watered down silverstein' these guys have some serious problems. "

haha. they do! Secretly, I downloaded their EP.

Anonymous (January 11, 2005)

Damn, reading these reviews shows that generic emo is on the way out

Anonymous (January 10, 2005)

generic poo. theres a name for you.

-WNB
jd

Anonymous (January 10, 2005)

"just the name alone will keep me from listening to this. lame lame lame"

Because the music is all about the names. Right?

Anonymous (January 10, 2005)

just the name alone will keep me from listening to this. lame lame lame.

-WNB
jd

Anonymous (January 10, 2005)

scores for the song 'every rose has its thorn'

this band sounds like another one of those bands thats making me angry and feel old. why doesnt anyone start a band that sounds like the bouncing souls anymore?

their name sucks too

if this sounds like 'watered down silverstein' these guys have some serious problems.

paul

chris_xxx (January 10, 2005)

this band needs to die

maverick (January 10, 2005)

"worst band/album name of the next 5 years"

Sadly, incorrect. There's a band called A Change Of Pace who sound just like this band but worse, and have their debut album coming out on fucking Immortal Records in a month or so. It's called An Offer You Can't Refuse

It is also terrible. In case you were wondering,

-Scott

FortyMinutesWest (January 9, 2005)

This is the worst band name ever, seriously. I've seen some shitty band names, but this is on a different level.

Anonymous (January 9, 2005)

worst band/album name of the next 5 years

Anonymous (January 9, 2005)

"so how would that make it any less shitty?"

This review was bullshit. They sound nothing like Yellowcard. Just because they previously had a violinist in the band does not mean they are a pop/punk band. Also, the new songs that weren't on Silence is Golden EP are so much better. The reworked songs just dont mesh too well. I thought it was a very solid album.

Anonymous (January 9, 2005)

"Of course a punknews review slams an album ap.net had been promoting..."

so how would that make it any less shitty?

Anonymous (January 9, 2005)

Of course a punknews review slams an album ap.net had been promoting...

Anonymous (January 9, 2005)

It's sad when you see a band's name and album title and it just makes you go "OH FUCK OFF!" because you now EXACTLY how it's going to sound and how bad it's goint to be.

Jesse (January 8, 2005)

You're copping my scene, bro. Lay off.

Marlon (January 8, 2005)

I love it when Brian trashes people. It's just so utterly beatiful because you know they must really suck. This score is for the review!