The Smackdown

The Smackdown: Calling The SpotsCalling The Spots (2005)
Goodfellow Records

Reviewer Rating: 1

Contributed by: Erin_JacksonErin Jackson
(others by this writer | submit your own)
Published on March 18th 2005Recipe for a the Smackdown song: take a short, hard, and heavy intro, add ear-piercing screaming, condense audio. So, you say you're looking for something to listen to while attempting crazy tricks at the skate park or while you break stuff? Well, kid…you've come to the right place. Scream-happy .

Recipe for a the Smackdown song: take a short, hard, and heavy intro, add ear-piercing screaming, condense audio.

So, you say you're looking for something to listen to while attempting crazy tricks at the skate park or while you break stuff? Well, kid…you've come to the right place. Scream-happy the Smackdown's Calling The Spots features 13 of the dirtiest, nastiest screamcore tracks (possibly) ever made. The band's website describes the band as "the sort of band that comes out of nowhere and creeps into your town in some shitty beat-up van and up opens a show for some totally insincere hardcore band and ends up stealing the show and the band's girlfriends." I'd add that while they're at the show, they kick the audience's collective teeth out, wipe the blood and spit off their boots, and assemble a necklace. This is some serious fucking hardcore.

The title track ambles along a drawn-out introduction, then explodes with the same indecipherable vocals before returning to an extended instrumental section that continues for a solid three minutes. This last track seems to be added as an afterthought, especially because it has nothing to do with any of the other songs.

Still, despite the energy and believable anger spewed forth by Rob Hardy, this band is a one-trick pony. Beyond a first listen that is largely motivated by curiosity, the CD is "unlistenable," unless you're a glutton for punishment.

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Fine Print: The following comments are owned by whoever posted them. We are not respon sible for them in any way. Seriously.

Anonymous (June 9, 2006)

I love this album, sorry to raise un ugly head of a thread, but screw it. I saw these guys live and they did indeed rock and rumble the place.

Anonymous (March 31, 2005)

great band.

they're sick live.
saw them here in sweden.

Anonymous (March 30, 2005)

I just wanted to say that you're all wrong. The Smackdown is'nt a bunch of annoying pain-in-the-ass kids with too much attitude and an urge to screw every girl they see. I'm not even sure they've all lost their virginity. And the attitude-thing is NOT annoying in the way asfor example The Hives. The Smackdown is just some thin vegan kids with the wildest and tightest liveshow ever, nothing but a sensational experience to see. I don't think anyone who has met them or seen them live would agree on what is written on this page.
If you get the chance, SEE THEM LIVE! And the record is great by the way...

Anonymous (March 24, 2005)

Whatever. That "stealing the show girlfriends" comment is the polar opposite of hardcore and punk. Since when is music a fucking competition? And fuck bands who do promo kits anyway...you can stick your successful tours and increased sales up your fucking urethras.

Anonymous (March 22, 2005)

"“the sort of band that comes out of nowhere and creeps into your town in some shitty beat-up van and up opens a show for some totally insincere hardcore band and ends up stealing the show and the band’s girlfriends"

I think that is something the label put as promokit description. I dont find anything on theri webbsiet but on the labels site. Cause this band dont seems to be jocks ...assholes! I think the whole Smackdown wrestling concept and name is a irony. My friend watched them live in Germany janury and he said it was just thin vegan punks that was more like a Hives hardcore band than a sexist jock-band. And evidently they kick ass live.

well well well ..i dont know i think i like them. bizzlebrizzle - i listen to some songs on their webbiste
http://www.the-smackdown.com

now Im gonna be hated caus i like them ....ahhhhhh

Anonymous (March 20, 2005)

I can imagine this band hitting on women...

"Hey babe, do you wanna lay The Smackdown?"

Anyway, The Rockers rule and will always rule, even if Shawn put Marty's head through a window back in '92. That was vicious for its time. I'm rambling.

Joe

Anonymous (March 20, 2005)

Score is for The Gordon Solie Motherfuckers, Bumpin' Uglies, and The Ultimate Warriors, who are all hardcore bands influenced by wrestling and way better than this band.

Anonymous (March 19, 2005)

Did anyone watch Smackdown tonight? Marty Janetty worked his ass off. Here's to hoping he gets a full-time contract.

-Scott]

yeah i wouldnt mind seeing him wrestle some more

pierrebouvier (March 19, 2005)

they are a good band, rumor as it some famous wrestler is going to take one there song's for intro

stevejonestherealbones (March 19, 2005)

- jones the bones

- stevejones8770@yahoo.com

stevejonestherealbones (March 19, 2005)

with their bandname...they sould have titled this "soundtrack to a headrush"

Anonymous (March 18, 2005)

scores for ken's comment, golden.

-Strewtho.

SethCohen (March 18, 2005)

I always wanted a Rock 'N Roll Express T-Shirt when I was little but I never got one. I also wanted a 1-2-3 Kid shirt, who we all know went on to later become Syxx and X-Pac. I don't know though, it's hard for anyone to beat Flyin' Brian, may he rest in peace, even when he was the Yellow Dog. Jesus Christ that was like fucking 15 years ago.

Anonymous (March 18, 2005)

soulseek, December of last year.

-BSD

bizzlebrizzle (March 18, 2005)

I take it Ken has opened for them.

On a musical level, they're actually pretty good... But if that's how they treat fellow bands/fans, they'd better get real.

Hardcore is a genre that doesn't allow for "rockstar" posing.

-BSD

Where'd you find any music by these guys?

Anonymous (March 18, 2005)

Meet The Smackdown's new PR guy... KEN!!!

LOL

Anonymous (March 18, 2005)

"“the sort of band that comes out of nowhere and creeps into your town in some shitty beat-up van and up opens a show for some totally insincere hardcore band and ends up stealing the show and the band’s girlfriends"

Or try this:
"A totally in-it-for-the-minute bunch of scenesters who thought hardcore began in 1999, who roll into town listening to their ipods and proceed to pose and act real tough. They won't understand the DIY band made up of nerdy kids who open for them, but they will ogle the opening bands' girlfriends like a bunch of sexist jocks looking to score. The Smackdown will play and everyone will be bored to shit. The opening bands stay out of respect for touring bands, but leave in protest after shitty banter about weed, beer and "pussy" coming from the Smackdown's vocalist during their set. The Smackdown will become confused: "Why does (insert town) not like us? Must be a bunch of faggot scenesters!" The Smackdown will proceed to update their super slick webpage's blog about the aforementioned "shitty" town and give "their side of the story" about the "infamous show". Tons of people proceed to care....not."

-Ken

sickboi (March 18, 2005)

I still have an ORGINAL Rockers shirt, circa 87'....

Beat that, fuckers...

Anonymous (March 18, 2005)

RAW > Smackdown

Anonymous (March 18, 2005)

I didn't see Smackdown, but I read that Marty did indeed work his ass off. Rockers, bitches!

captaincrunch (March 18, 2005)

My inline hockey team is called The Smackdown. We made the name back in '96 but now people think we are ripping off the WWE. Should we change the name? I think its a funny name.

Not-To-Regret (March 18, 2005)

A band named after one of the Rock's original catchphrases is as appealing as "Walking Tall".

TheOneTrueBill (March 18, 2005)

It's fake!

maverick (March 18, 2005)

Did anyone watch Smackdown tonight? Marty Janetty worked his ass off. Here's to hoping he gets a full-time contract.

-Scott

bizzlebrizzle (March 18, 2005)

even though the score is low, this review makes me want to listen to this band.

Anonymous (March 18, 2005)

Score's for the name "Erin Jackson."

-Chinatown