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Staff IconTriumph of Lethargy Skinned Alive to Death - Helpless (Cover Artwork)

Triumph of Lethargy Skinned Alive to
Death

Helpless (2005)
Makebreak

Reviewer Rating:


Contributed by: Jesse
(
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Published on May 12th 2006


Jeee-yeeeeee-sus.

Never seen a band sum up their career so simply in their album title. KA-POW!

Triumph of Lethargy Skinned Alive to Death (or TOLSKATD, to sum up their horrible name) consists of two dudes, so it's like if Tears for Fears tried to be the Velvet Underground while doing their best Xiu Xiu impersonation and throwing in some shitty wannabe Sonic Youth guitar riffs in the background. In other words, dear reader, plug your nose -- this one's a stinker.

It's not quite the atonal vocals (shudder) or the horrible lyrics (see: "It doesn't take a demolition man to break this heart") -- it's the absolute lack of any idea of how to make music. Two dudes making absurdist music with samples (note: None are listed for credit, so they better be careful before someone tosses a VI on their ass [note: VI stands for Vanilla Ice]) does not account for good music. And their attempts at some sort of mashup glitch hop / audio collage fall pretty short too. You can't just make noise (unless you're Lou Reed trying to fulfill a record contract) and call it music. And Jesus, dear Reader, who gave these geeks a violin? Or are they just sodomizing a helpless (see: album title) kitten?

And if that weren't enough, they had the gall to throw bones at my boy Leonard with their shitfest "Sincerely, L. Cohen." Dear reader, these junkmoneys are putting me at the end of my rope. Flummoxed, even! Experimental music needs conceptualization. It needs some sort of drive, balance, direction, starpower -- fuck, it needs anything just to keep it from sucking. And this release, dear reader, has nothing.



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    welcome_to_this_neotokyo (September 7, 2006)

    score is for being "Flummoxed"

    love_for_jesse (May 23, 2006)

    I'm sorry, but... Jesse - you don't know what in the fuck you are talking about - AGAIN. I'm really growing lethargic from the lack of talent in all of the so called "music critics" out here on the web. Have an open forum and all you get are dick holes like Jesse who is obviously a no talent ass clown.

    Your review is not only weak in premise, it lacks any substance at all. Not only are you uninformed as to who this group is, but you even made errors in the: "(or TOLSKATD, to sum up their horrible name)".

    punknews.org should be ashamed for letting people with no more than a personal opinion write reviews.

    As for Jesse, I wish you would walk away from the keyboard and get a job more suited to you. The fast food industry would be a good place to start, for blatant reasons.

    rkl (May 15, 2006)

    figures that people who like this also like am! and larry arms.

    crap sticks with crap.

    adamvms (May 14, 2006)

    to the reviewer

    this album is an aquired taste... it is spencer from the murder city devils and anything he has his hands in is just absolutely amazing

    i can understand how you may find it challenging but to give it such a low score is just ridiculous... relisten and if by the 2nd or 3rd time around you don't get it then so be it... BUT this album rules and should be checked out

    GreenVandal (May 12, 2006)

    These dudes totally stole my bands name.

    Anonymous (May 12, 2006)

    It's spencer moody from MURDER CITY DEVILS motherfucker...my favorite singer of all time, but yeah form what I have heard check out SMOKE AND SMOKE instead....they're a really awesome somewhat abrasive sounding noise rock band with just bass drims and vocals, and his lyrics are awesome

    skaboom (May 12, 2006)

    We have a new contender for worst band name ever!

    the_other_scott (May 12, 2006)

    i've been meaing to check these dudes out since they're Murder City Devil-related but this make sme not really want to hear it. i'll prb ably check it out anyways.

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