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Various - Short Music for Short People (Cover Artwork)

Various

Various: Short Music for Short PeopleShort Music for Short People (1999)
Fat Wreck Chords

Reviewer Rating: 3
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Contributed by: ChrisGorman2Chris Gorman
(others by this writer | submit your own)

Wow. 101 bands with 30 second songs. I think this is a really cool idea, but sadly, it's an idea that doesn't really work. FAT head honcho Fat Mike got together the cream of the punk crop to play 30 second songs, and compiled them on the ultimate punk sampler. Most of the FAT roster is included, as .
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Wow. 101 bands with 30 second songs. I think this is a really cool idea, but sadly, it's an idea that doesn't really work. FAT head honcho Fat Mike got together the cream of the punk crop to play 30 second songs, and compiled them on the ultimate punk sampler. Most of the FAT roster is included, as is much of the Epitaph, Hopeless, Lookout, etc rosters. I'll proceed to hit the highlights.

    Less Than Jake - Anchor - Feels like one of the only whole songs on here, I would like to hear it in a longer version. Classic LTJ style.

    Bad Religion - Out of Hand - Good song, even though its so short, it still manages to spout out the usual BR though-provoking lyrics.

    Blink-182 - Family Reunion - "Shit piss fuck cunt cocksucker motherfucker tits fart turd and twat." This about says it for blink.

    Green Day - The Ballad of Wilhelm Fink - Good little acoustic ditty.

    Lagwagon - Randal Gets Drunk - ska-punk, Lagwagon stylee.

    Gwar - Fishfuck - Its gross, its cheezy, its not punk, its GWAR!

    Mr. T Experience - Told you Once - This song says "fuck" a lot.

    Descendents - I like Food - How can you not love the Descendents? I think their short songs are great, and this is no exception.

    Dance Hall Crashers - Triple Track - This ska song actually talks about this album! "Got in a fight with Fat Mike when he called and told me, to write a thirty second song for his little CD".

    Guttermouth - Don Camero Lost his Mind - An add for a magic shop, kinda funny.

    Circle Jerks - Deny Everything - I like the Circle Jerks and you should too.

    The Offspring - Hand Grenades - A great song that gives instructions for building explosives, right in your own home! Punk Rawk!

    Mad Caddies - Mike Booted Our First Song, so We Recorded this One Instead - Classic Caddies style, I wish this song was longer. I think this band plays some of the most unique ska-punk around.

    Youth Brigade - You Dont Know Shit - Great song telling all there detractors just where they can go. Great chorus too.

    Spazz - A Prayer for the Complete and Utter eradication of all Generic Pop-Punk - The lone power violence band on this comp. Good song actually, about their hatred of mainstream punk, ska and swing. I love the vocals in this band.

    Tilt - John For the Working Man - I like Tilt a lot, and this song is up there with their best work. Why does it have to be 30 seconds long! Arg. Oh well. Agressive female vocals over FAT style punk.

    NOFX - See Her Pee - The usual from NOFX. When we bash Blink for being too juvenile, we have to remember who influenced them. This song is about wanting to see a girl squat in a parking lot and take a piss. Really catchy.

    Rancid - Blacklisted - Good punk tune, about what you've come to expect from Rancid. I'd like to hear a longer version.

    The Dwarves - The band that Wouldnt Die - A really cool song with some good vox. Typical Dwarves song about death and poop and stuff.

    Lunachicks - Pretty Houses - The Lunachicks are Patty Smith to Tilt's Blondie. I love this band, and their screechy brand of punk - pseudo metal. This song is helps to end this CD on a great note.

So yeah, there you go, what I think are the highlights from this disc. There are other great bands on here too, such as The Living End, Samiam, Good Riddance, Nerf Herder, The Damned, H2O, Blag Flag, Anti-Flag, Screeching Weasel and Bodyjar. However, many of the contributions to this disc are just plain boring, as the songs have no time to develop. Some of the songs feel very incomplete, others feel rushed, and still other are just wastes of time that you would skip over if they were on the bands CD. Still, this has practically every punk band you could want, with only a few glaring omissions (Goldfinger? Voodoo Glow Skulls? Refused? Leatherface? Dropkick Murphys?). Anyway, its a cheap-o comp, so I would say buy it for the few good songs and the tons of bands. There will be something you like on here.

 

 
People who liked this also liked:
The Falcon - God Don't Make No Trash Or Up Your Ass With Broken GlassAgainst Me! - As The Eternal CowboyNOFX - 45 or 46 Songs That Weren't Good Enough To Go On Our Other RecordsThe Mighty Mighty Bosstones - A Jackknife To A SwanDead to Me - Cuban BallerinaGreen Day - InsomniacMe First and the Gimme Gimmes - Love Their CountryMad Caddies - Quality SoftcoreAgainst Me! - We're Never Going Home DVDNOFX - The Decline

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Anonymous (September 1, 2002)

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Anonymous (November 16, 2001)

By the same token, they could have included MXPX and the International Noise Conspiracy.

-Sr. Potpourri

Anonymous (October 29, 2001)

Where are Fugazi, Boy Sets Fire, Osker, Hot Water Music and Gob?

Anonymous (October 14, 2001)

..with the exception of Tilt and Tsunami Bomb, yes. Most HARMONICS in women's vocals sound the same.

Anonymous (October 8, 2001)

No need to be rude, just asking a question. I still dont see why DHC sounds cliched, nobody really sounds like them. Are you saying that all girl bands sound cliched? If so, then I respectfully disagree.

Anonymous (October 8, 2001)

...as in THEY ALL SOUND THE SAME.

Anonymous (October 7, 2001)

"I don't really like the Dance Hall Crashers song. The backup vocals and harmonies when girls sing are so cliched. "

Why is that? Cliche how? I dont really get that...

Anonymous (October 6, 2001)

Sorry, once again, my youthful ignorance shines out because of a comment I carelessly made. I should rephrase myself. Rancid's bassist is ONE OF the best in the business. Also, to those of you who had taken offense to my Gwar comment, I was just being foolishly stereotypical because that is the only song I have heard by them, but it's still no reason to act like the asshole Ick-x-Strife is being, making generalized statements about my worth to the world when he has no idea who I am, where I'm from, what I do, etc.

By the way......

Strung Out's "Klawsterfobia" is a major winner on the comp.

I don't really like the Dance Hall Crashers song. The backup vocals and harmonies when girls sing are so cliched.

-Sr. Potpourri

Anonymous (October 6, 2001)

This cd rules.
Misfits and Less Than Jake songs are the best on the album.
Fat Wreck rules

Anonymous (October 6, 2001)

I think they are both great, I just dont think they are the best in the business like the dude said.

Anonymous (October 6, 2001)

Matt Freeman taught himself bass, he's pretty fucking good for a guy that taught himself how to play. Same goes for Flea. I'm not saying Les Claypool isn't talented, but give Freeman and Flea a little respect, they came from a scene that songs usually consist of three bass notes played over and over again for a minute, not much to work from.

coldjuly (October 6, 2001)

I just read rightcliques' post way down there that stated that most fat bands were joke..pee pee poo dick bands..well let me clarify that by naming off some bands who dont exactly fit that label Lagwagon, NUFAN, Tilt, Utters, Rise Against, Good Riddance, Zero Down, Strung Out, Sick of it all, Avail, and a bunch of others..some may have humorus themes, cover art..etc, but have very serious well written and sometimes very personal lyrics..Im not one of those fat/epitaph junkies for sure but get your crap straight before you go making assumptions.

coldjuly (October 5, 2001)

You want a good bassist?? take Tomek, formerly in the satanic surfers..and listen to hero of our time..those are some bad ass bass lines. C-razy

Anonymous (October 5, 2001)

oh and its not "gwar" its "GEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAARRRR"

:)

Anonymous (October 5, 2001)

To the dude that said Matt from Rancid is comparable to Flea, I would just like to suggest that you check out some Primus. Then come talk about bass players.

Anonymous (October 5, 2001)

Gwar is definitely awesome. more bands should be like Gwar. Matt Freeman is damn good, but if you want to here a bass player, listen to Victor Wooten(he playes bass for Bela Fleck and the FLecktones) or Jacko Paturi(sp), who is one of the most insane muscians of all time. He was the bass player for the jazz/rock band Weather Report. He is the self proclaimed 'best bass player in the world' and i'm sure anyone who has heard him play wont put up much of an argument.ok, thats enough.

'Dirty Needles' is a great song by the Weasle, and it's on this cd!wow!-fathead

JimmyArndt (October 4, 2001)

you know what, gwar is the best band ever. they're not my favorite, but they're the best. they should be your best band ever too. if you dont like them your an idiot. i will give this album a ten for gwar making an appearence. ive owned this for years and never listened to the whole thing.

icK-x-Strife (October 4, 2001)

"Gwar sucks"

The fact that Gwar are better than you in every way possible is no reason to not like them.

- icK-x-Strife

Anonymous (October 4, 2001)

These aren't sound bits, they're SONGS, and it's good for those of us who aren't quite so close-minded. I'm gonna put up a more detailed post later, but here are some of the songs that haven't been mentioned yet that I think stand out.

Fizzy Bangers- Pretty much sums up the whole CD: "Why can't people understand/ I've got a short attention span/ short attention span" is the whole song. If I were them, I'd release it to the radio. Hah!

The Living End- Just listen to the guitar part. It's mind-blowing that this is only a 3-piece band.

The Ataris- Great song that's NOT about girls. I wish someone would break Marilyn Manson's fucking neck, too.

H20- Made me laugh my ass off.

Just a few more things...

Gwar sucks

The Spazz song is okay, but I don't see why everyone is giving them so much recognition for just bashing other bands.

Rancid proves once again that their bassist is the best in the business, comparable to Flea.

That's my two cents... after my two cents from before...

-Sr. Potpourri

Anonymous (October 4, 2001)

It's good in the sense that you can hear just about any band that someone has ever mentioned. However, listening to 30 second sound bits gets old, fast.

Anonymous (October 4, 2001)

I hate Anti-Flag much myself. I personally don't like to be stereotyped as a "Christian Fuck."

icK-x-Strife (October 4, 2001)

You're entitled to your own opinion.

- icK-x-Strife

Anonymous (October 4, 2001)

anti flag is a joke band because they are shit

-faceecaf

icK-x-Strife (October 3, 2001)

How is Anti-Flag a joke band?

- icK-x-Strife

Anonymous (October 3, 2001)

If Fat Wreck is all a bunch of novelty bands, you could just say Epitaph is a bunch of dark/hardcore bands. Seriously, every label has its own sound. Most stuff on Fat seems more mainstream, yes, but it's got some AWESOME bands (ie: Strung Out, Lagwagon, Good Riddance, Me First.., Propaghandi, NOFX). Epitaph is a notch above Fat, I'd say, but a lot of the bands sound a lot like the Offspring (older, better stuff, that is).

Anonymous (October 3, 2001)

AFI's song owns this fucking cd

Artman (October 3, 2001)

This album is great! Sure some bands don't appeal to me cause there is a lot of different types of bands on this disc, but that was the point: To get as many bands on one disc as possible. I discovered many bands off of this CD that I never would have without it.

"One Hit Wonder" - Great, great band! Trust me, this one band that is literally an undiscovered jem!

"Limp" is another pearl that I thank this album for.

"Misfits" being another. Sure I was aware of a band that was out there called the "Misfits", but never bothered giving them a try until this album.

Became a "Swingin' Utters" fan because of this album.

"Dogpiss" too.

I also credit this album into reassuring me that "Bad Religion" was still cool. "No Substance" left me worried...

Believe it or not, I discovered "the Ataris" because of this album. And yes, I was living under a rock.

Say what you will about Fat Wreck Chords, but they did go out of their way and help spotlight a bunch of bands that normally won't get noticed.

Artman
AIM: Artman009

Anonymous (October 3, 2001)

Good Riddance is not a joke band either.

Anonymous (October 3, 2001)

I think the only joke band on fat is Anti-flag.- fathead

ETx310 (October 2, 2001)

ya, emperically speaking, I don't see Fat as a "joke band label." NOFX is the closest thing to fitting that claim. Maybe I should pay more attention. Maybe I'm missing some of the comments in between songs at the Propagandhi and Sick Of It All shows.

Anonymous (October 2, 2001)

To the devolved individual who said that FAT is all joke bands...are you sure you are talking about the right label? I mean, Propaghandi, Strung Out, Anti-Flag, Avail, Rise Against....so many serious groups. Even the groups on there like Less Than Jake, Mad Caddies, NOFX, Wizo, bands that aren't that deep, still aren't joke bands, and still write serious songs. You can bash my review all ya want, but don't make stupid blanket statements.

-CG

Anonymous (October 2, 2001)

To the person who said Lagwagon is not a ska-punk band...well thats very true, but the song that they do on here is ska punk. A lot of non ska bands do ska songs now and then. Murphys Law and Offspring come to mind.

-CG

Bryne (October 2, 2001)

Boy, you sound chipper today. Get a sense of humor, and don't be so fucking overanalytical. I'm not a betting man, but if I were, I'd bet you're the only person on the face of the Earth that cares about some of these songs being longer than 30 seconds. Oh, and since when is Fat all novelty bands? Is Anti-Flag a novelty band? God, how stupid people piss me off.

rightclique (October 2, 2001)

Did anyone other than me notice that there was serious false advertisment on this record? There are numerous songs on it that are longer than 30 seconds long.. The br song is about 40 seconds long and they have several normal songs that are'nt much longer than that, like change of ideas, which is only 54 seconds long.. Also, just so you know fathead, fat wreck chords is a pretty shitty label. They're all novelty bands and stupid shit. They make a ton of supposedly funny songs that really turn out to be stupid. I do agree, however, that strung out is a pretty sweet band, and they don't belong on fat. For people who even attempt to compare fat with epitaph, you are dumb.. Fat mostly tends to people who have that "i eat poop and make dick jokes" crowd. I can't say that i hate everything they put out, but most of it.. I like almost 50% of all nofx songs. I hate joke bands..... They piss me off. Its not even punk.

Anonymous (October 2, 2001)

Just one thing. Lagwagon is definately not Ska-Punk

icK-x-Strife (October 2, 2001)

Good review. Great album. Sure, some of the songs are pretty lame, but the good ones more than make up for them.

Gwar fucking rule. Maybe I'll review their upcoming album 'Violence Has Arrived' on here sometime in the near future.

- icK-x-Strife

punky (October 2, 2001)

Yeah and i don't know why propagandhi didn't have a song on the comp. I know tha Millencolin said that 'it's a stupid idea'.Well i don't like them anyway...

punky (October 2, 2001)

I have two slap-a-ham V/A 7'inches and they suck.I have respect for some grind core bands like patareni and agathocles, but most of the stuff on it just sucked.
This compilation is really good.To me the best songs have to be by:
AFI,useless id,D4,jugheads,lunachicks and well spazz kicks ass too.

Anonymous (October 2, 2001)

I have to agree with some of the earleier comments made. This reviewer did a great job picking out the shit on this CD. Fury 66 have a great song, as do Trigger Happy, AFI, D4, satanic Surfers...I could go on and on. Buy this CD.

Cos (October 2, 2001)

The Living End song fucking destroys. Probably my favorite song on the comp. I kinda like the Vandals' little novelty-ditty, D4 and AFI, Green Day's acoustic song, and am continually embarassed by the absolute shite that Dance Hall Crashers insist on putting out.

ETx310 (October 2, 2001)

"Cookie Cutout cardboard bands, and we all sound the same" Pulley (btw new album ROCKS) I like this comp too

Anonymous (October 1, 2001)

What About DILLINGER FOUR Farts Are Jazz To Assholes Is A Great Song

Anonymous (October 1, 2001)

I'm sure you guys have a lot of fun talking shit about all these "generic" pop punk bands....why don't you go ahead and make some music of your own.

(band members can disregard this)

Anonymous (October 1, 2001)

by the way, Jughead's Revenge has an awesome song on here.- fathead

Anonymous (October 1, 2001)

How in the fuck can you hate Fat wreck chords (home to one of the best bands of all time STRUNG OUT) and then glorify Spazz? It's cool if you like them for their message or their crusty-ness, but judging on a talent scale alone, the worst band on Fat has more talent in their left ass-cheek than Spazz does in all their songs combined.but whatever, it's your opinion man.- fathead

Anonymous (October 1, 2001)

you did a good job in picking out the worst songs on the cd.

El_Buerdo_Magnifico (October 1, 2001)

I don't think the point of this album was to be the greatest compilation ever or anything. It was probably just a novelty thing. Cheesy, yes... but what else would you expect from Fat.

Having said that, I hate that damn label and I like very few of the bands involved. However, it totally served its purpose as a good novelty comp. Of course, it's not an original idea at all as Slap A Ham released three 7" compilations with a similar idea (short songs and a shitload of bands) and Very Small also released a 100-band compilation LP a couple years before.

Also, I can't believe the author didn't point out the irony of Spazz's song. It was probably the best song on the compilation because it was an actual song, not a silly jingle (probably because most Spazz songs are about that length anyway). Plus, it totally killed. The funny thing about it, though, is that it blasts generic pop-punk and ska bands, which make up about 95% of the compilation.

Also, criticizing the compilation for bands that weren't on it is dumb. That would be like going to a movie and taking points away from it because certain actors weren't involved.

Just my two cents but I did like the CD.

- EBM

Anonymous (October 1, 2001)

This is most likely the most innovative and best punk comp ever. Oh, by the way, the reviewer left out some really great songs, such as NoMeansNo's "No Fgnuik" or the "Outhouse of Doom" one. Also, the Blink song is just another attempt to draw a middle-school audience to them. It's not funny. The Offspring song is better than their new crap, but funny songs weren't really their calling. All in all, though, this is a GREAT comp.

-Sr. Potpourri

Anonymous (October 1, 2001)

good idea for a comp, too bad it was already done a few years earlier (and better) by very small records on their "wood panel pacer and mags" lp 7"

Anonymous (October 1, 2001)

everyone, including the reviewer, is forgeting the Teen Idols song 'ketchup soup'. I love that song.- fathead

Bryne (October 1, 2001)

The Less Than Jake song is definitely the best song on this CD. Although I'm not so sure having the best 30 second song is that much of an achievement. Oh, and GWAR f-ing owns.

Anonymous (October 1, 2001)

Everyone always says that Fat Mike hates Goldfinger, but I have yet to see proof. I would really love to see some proof, cuz otherwise, I will continue to disregard it as a childish rumor.

Anonymous (October 1, 2001)

For those who are curious:
-Goldfinger wasn't included because Fat Mike hates 'em.
-Fat Mike doesn't like Face to Face's new stuff all that much, but he thinks their old stuff was good.
-Millencolin was asked to contribute a song, but they turned it down. They were the only band asked who didn't do it.

I don't know why I have this random information in my brain, but I do.

coldjuly (October 1, 2001)

good review..good album and good idea for the "getting into punk rock" kiddies. The 88fl and strung out songs are the best...the satanic surfers one is good too.

Anonymous (October 1, 2001)

i also enjoyed the pennywise and unwritten law songs

Anonymous (October 1, 2001)

A lot of good and a lot of bad but it is still a great idea. The Useless ID song kicks ass. Bands I wish were on here as well; Face to Face, Millencolin, SNFU. Still it had lots of really great bands.

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