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Good Charlotte needs to take advice from a certain Gainesville furniture martial artist: They need to "stop, take some time to think" and "figure out what's important" to them.

Let me elaborate...

Implied in my All Time Low review, I am indignant towards local artists who reach fame and then abuse it (not to mention having those same bands jammed into my brain by the misguided adoration of everyone and their mother in Maryland). But I'll admit that when I heard "The Young and the Hopeless" in fifth grade, I dug it, but at that age I was also under the impression that cooties were going to be the next Black Death. Nothing could save their music for me nowadays; not their cool hair cuts, not the addition of synthesizers, not the incredible speed of Synyster Gate's guitar wankary, not even a cameo in a Rancid music video. With all of those futile attempts, I’m sure you could imagine my bewilderment as to why Good Charlotte really thought that a remix album was a good idea. I couldn't be the only one who has heard those Haunted Cities remixes, right?

To start off, Greatest Remixes pulls together an “all-star” collection of guests ranging from the likes of Bubba Sparxxx, Patrick Stump (Fall Out Boy), Mat Devine (Kill Hannah), the Academy Is… and Metro Station, to name a few. Each contributes their own unique input on the band’s greatest hits, but if you couldn’t stand their songs before, I’m sure the addition of the Metro Station covering it isn’t going to sway you in any way at all. To be quite honest, the whining choruses of “I Don’t Wanna Be in Love” make me cringe.

That cover aside, the remixes are basically the removal of guitars and acoustic drums and replaced with predictable synthesizers and drum machines. “All Black,” done by Mat Devine, only stands to prove that Joel Madden’s voice is incredibly obnoxious -- why Divine decided to electronically stutter his vocals is beyond me. Million $ Mano’s stab at the ‘classic’ “The Anthem” is thankfully almost completely void of a Madden twin, with the exception of the sampled line "this is the anthem, throw all your hands up." The two previously unreleased tracks, “Anxiety” and “Fight Song” aren’t necessarily what I’d think are acceptable cuts to hold over fans until their next album. “Anxiety”’s dance beat is almost too similar to that “River” song, and the latter track, albeit featuring one of the better mainstream rappers in the Game, has enough n-words and cliché anti-Bush rhetoric to make a Kanye West question his patriotism.

Good Charlotte, there aren’t many nails in your coffin left to drive, and I advise that you cease the scams and release a rock ‘n' roll masterpiece. If being a musician is really “important” to you, you might want to consider “stopping” what you’re doing.






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    Posted by walchick12 on 2009-07-07 03:13:29

    i have to agree. i mean, i love good charlotte, they are my favorite band, but this album is horrible. the songs i just wanna live, the anthem, and girls and boys- along with most of the others- were completely butchered in this album. although a few songs seemed not so bad, such as los angeles world wide and anxiety were really good in my opinion, and keep your hands off my girl was fairly decent.

    please come out with a better album if you want to keep ur career!

    Posted by danielsan on 2008-12-08 20:44:05

    Am I the only one that assumes everyone on this site is roughly the same age as me and then feel really old when the truth comes out?

    PS I saw this review on the sidebar and laughed at the album title.. I'm glad the review was written. I'd rather have a shitty record get made fun of then read a three-star review of some dime-a-dozen indie rock band

    Posted by alchron77 on 2008-12-08 15:50:17

    "...and the latter track, albeit featuring one of the better mainstream rappers in the Game"

    the Game = suckage = this review. Ah, to be young and stupid again. I remember when I thought Coolio was kind of cool.

    And for the record, Ageism rules. I hate the young and old alike.

    Posted by SilentStorms on 2008-12-06 08:28:30
    My Score:

    What's with all the ageism? So he's 17 ... who gives a shit how old he is. Mike, you're doing well, and you're trying, so it's all good. Plus you think Good Charlotte is garbage, so you're ok in my book. Score's for people actually doing reviews for this site.

    Posted by mikexdude on 2008-12-04 11:07:53

    You're such a cutie, Eazyd2.

    Posted by eazyd2 on 2008-12-04 01:46:58

    such a stupid fuckin review by a stupid poser kid. fuck off.

    Posted by lostandclowned on 2008-12-04 00:22:42

    that cover art is so bad.

    Posted by mikexdude on 2008-12-03 17:59:21

    I go on this site to talk to the kind of people I don't have in highschool--punk music lovers, so stop trying to pick obvious fights like you were still there.

    You can always not read it/ignore it... I mean, you don't even like the band, so I don't understand your motive.

    I apologize for being a dick in the other review comments.

    Posted by givemeamuseumandillfillit on 2008-12-03 17:48:06

    Dude, you think i'm upset? I did the same thing when i was 17 on this very site, that's the angle i'm coming from.

    Posted by telegraphrocks on 2008-12-03 17:39:09
    My Score:

    I embarrassingly do like one Good Charlotte song. The one on The Young And The Hopeless (titled?) that starts off "if you want me to wait...".

    That is all.

    I suck.

    Score's for admitting stuff.

    Posted by mikexdude on 2008-12-03 14:57:32

    "Good Charlotte were barely HOLDING ON in the first place"

    Brian, there is a Good Charlotte song called "Hold On"-- I don't know if you were trying to be funny, but I laughed.

    Posted by mikexdude on 2008-12-03 14:55:52

    "Dude, just don't write reviews. You're not even being informative and pretty much all the records you've reviewed doesn't need to be reviewed"

    Besides this and BMTH, all the bands I attempt to review belong on this site. so.... 2/11? Also, I'm sorry you have such a problem with me reviewing, unfortunately you're right in saying I'm not good at it... which is why I'm trying to better myself. At the displeasure of everyone on this site, of course. Give me a break, man and chill the fuck out.

    Posted by givemeamuseumandillfillit on 2008-12-03 13:52:04

    Dude, just don't write reviews. You're not even being informative and pretty much all the records you've reviewed doesn't need to be reviewed. Just post it as comments because that's pretty much what they look like anyways.

    And fallingbalblabamxpxwrongdude84: NFG fell off fast? They're still playing 1000-3000 cap rooms everywhere. Sure the latest record was a bummer but they did the fastest bounce back i've ever seen a band do (yes, i consider 2 years very fast to tour, get dropped, make a tideover record, another world tour, another tideover record and then finally resigning and making a new record).

    Posted by inagreendase on 2008-12-03 13:28:06

    GC and NFG fell off so fast, its incredible

    Nah, NFG took years to fall off; then they pretty much climbed back up.

    Good Charlotte were barely holding on in the first place.

    I liked Good Charlotte's self-titled album when it came out, but I was also 14. Which makes even me older than Mike. And I'm not that old.

    Posted by chrisss on 2008-12-03 10:33:38

    "i do love lifestyles of the rich and famous cause that really is just a great song..."

    Also this is an incredibly depressing statement.

    Posted by chrisss on 2008-12-03 10:32:14

    "To start off, Greatest Remixes pulls together an “all-star” collection of guests ranging from the likes of Bubba Sparxxx, Patrick Stump (Fall Out Boy), Mat Devine (Kill Hannah), the Academy Is… and Metro Station, to name a few."

    I take extreme pride in the fact that I recognize but one of those names.

    Posted by bongsmcj on 2008-12-03 10:22:58

    i really liked the self titled album when it came out and i was in the seventh grade... i still jam it from time to time... waldorfworldwide baby!

    i think most of their other stuff pretty much blows but i do love lifestyles of the rich and famous cause that really is just a great song...

    Posted by samheaton85 on 2008-12-03 05:50:26

    I would just like to add to the deserved scathing review, the cover looks like a blatant rip off of a great electronic act Boys Noize

    Posted by grafixx on 2008-12-03 01:53:38

    good charlotte has become limp bizkit!

    Posted by BarleyPat on 2008-12-03 00:15:35

    So what came out when everyone else was in 5th grade? I had to look it up:

    Please Hammer, Don't Hurt 'Em
    Fear of a Black Planet
    Frizzle Fry
    Social Distortion (s/t)
    Paula Abdul - Shut up and Dance
    AmeriKKKa's Most Wanted
    Scumdogs of the Universe
    Step by Step - NKOTB
    Danzig II
    Cowboys From Hell
    Facelift
    Ritual de lo Habitual
    Mamma Said Knock You Out
    Cherry Pie
    Rust in Peace
    Seasons in the Abyss
    Against the Grain
    Gonna Make You Sweat

    Posted by SunKing on 2008-12-03 00:13:50

    umm... kind of in response to cos's post....

    http://www.abc.net.au/news/stories/2007/08/31/2020127 .htm

    Posted by jacknife737 on 2008-12-02 21:38:38

    does even the mainstream care about this band anymore?

    Posted by mikexdude on 2008-12-02 21:27:42

    Archangel, blame this guy: http://www.punknews.org/review/7696

    Posted by no_face on 2008-12-02 21:25:51
    My Score:

    score is for first line of the review

    Posted by Archangel on 2008-12-02 21:23:04

    I almost asked why this review was even posted.

    Posted by Cos on 2008-12-02 21:14:14

    http://www.residentadvisor.net/images/reviews/2007/boys-noize-oi -oi-oi.jpg

    Good to see that their album art is as derivative and limp and their music.

    Again, i quoth Chris Rock "Good Charlotte? More like mediocre Green Day!"

    Posted by mikexdude on 2008-12-02 21:03:03

    "Mike touches other boys in their swimsuit area"

    I fail to see how this is a problem.

    Posted by descendentmark on 2008-12-02 20:47:10

    Damn, I was out of college when the Young and Hopeless came out. I don't know why everyone thinks Good Charlotte sucks now! They Have Always SUCKED!!!! But what do I know I'm just and old fuck.

    Posted by mattramone on 2008-12-02 20:40:04

    Mike touches other boys in their swimsuit area.

    Posted by CCSummers on 2008-12-02 20:31:35

    Does this feature Lil Wayne?

    Posted by wonton on 2008-12-02 20:29:24

    well, i lol at them so im not uber hating you for it.

    i just kinda predicted that you would do this review, especially after the bmth review.

    Posted by mikexdude on 2008-12-02 20:09:34

    when i saw a shitty review i knew it was mike's.

    Ouch! ;-)

    Posted by wonton on 2008-12-02 20:08:05

    oh yeah, WALDORF REPRESENT!

    Posted by wonton on 2008-12-02 20:06:59

    when i saw a shitty review i knew it was mike's.

    Posted by chrisafi on 2008-12-02 19:50:41

    Aw leave the poor kid alone! :P

    I listened to the first Good Charlotte cd (was it self titled, i don't really know nor care), but it was standard, middle of the road pop punk, nothing particuarly wrong with it. This however, is utterly vile.

    However their next album will have songs about breaking up with Paris Hilton on it, which could see it become the worst album of the decade very easily

    Posted by miniblindbandit on 2008-12-02 18:38:06

    i'm surprised these guys haven't river phoenix'd yet.

    Posted by mikexdude on 2008-12-02 18:07:05

    Yep! I got my math wrong probably. I'm turning 17 this month.

    i've just been going down Punk New's "new release" list and reviewing as much as i can. so yeah, i actually listened to this shit.

    maybe one day i'll be a good enough writer for punknews. a boy can dream!

    Posted by crackpotdemagogue on 2008-12-02 17:44:31

    what the fuck? this guy is 15? that's a freakout.

    Posted by waitingroom on 2008-12-02 17:27:48

    Mike is in 11th grade.

    Posted by Torgo on 2008-12-02 16:18:56

    The Young and the Hopeless came out when I was in 8th grade. and I thought I was young on here!

    Posted by Tokin66 on 2008-12-02 16:09:58

    5th grade?! So that means your in 10th grade now? I never realized how young these reviewers are.

    I thought I was young. In 5th grade I was jamming out to new albums such as NOFX's "Punk in Drublic" (which came out that year), and Weezer's Blue album...
    Ah, 1994 was a good year for rock music

    Posted by joemomma420666 on 2008-12-02 16:08:18
    My Score:

    i think that makes him 15 or so. score is for being 15.

    Posted by 3pidemiC on 2008-12-02 15:04:33

    "The Young and the Hopeless" came out when you were in 5th grade!? How old are you?

    Posted by danpib08 on 2008-12-02 15:02:02
    My Score:

    Ha, Ha you actually listened to the crap and wrote a review.

    Posted by LinoleumMagazine on 2008-12-02 15:00:23

    "cease the scams and release a rock ‘n' roll masterpiece"

    Mike are you fucking with us?

    Posted by crackpotdemagogue on 2008-12-02 14:04:10
    My Score:

    this review is blasphemous. good charlotte invented punk. score is for everything these guys have ever done. up teh bible punx.

    Posted by freesandwich on 2008-12-02 13:29:51
    My Score:

    what does baldsteve have to say about this?

    Posted by theonetruebill on 2008-12-02 13:17:14

    You're young.

    Posted by nocigar on 2008-12-02 13:07:07
    My Score:

    Score is for all mainstream rap. Oh yea, and everything these douchebags have ever released before.

    Posted by GlamBalam on 2008-12-02 12:56:10
    My Score:

    For a fan it is a shock at first, but then again their last two records weren't that great eighter.. I kinda like some remixes better than the original songs

    Posted by fallingupwards84 on 2008-12-02 12:28:42

    this band and NFG fell off so fast, its incredible

    Posted by preston on 2008-12-02 12:17:14

    Ew.

    Is it true these guys signed a contract for a reality show where they spend one year living inside Paris Hilton's pussy? 'Cause that's what I heard.

    Posted by oldpunkerforever on 2008-12-02 12:07:21

    wait, let me look at my calender, no, its not april 1st...-oldpunker-

    Posted by mattramone on 2008-12-02 11:43:13

    Flamebait.

    Also you being in fifth grade when Good Charlotte came out is extrmemely depressing to me.

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