Interviews: We'll Do it Live: With Blag Dahlia (The Dwarves)

Posted by Rich on Monday, October 1, 2012 at 8:00 PM (EDT)

Another Q&A is wrapped up and in our record books. Thanks so much to the most high Blag Dahlia for coming out and thanks to all of you for taking part.
Today, we're incredibly excited to bring you a brand new Fest 11 live Q&A featuring Blag Dahlia, legendary frontman for The Dwarves. Blag will be on hand for the next hour or so to take all your questions about himself, The Dwarves and maybe even about some of their unusual cover art.

Blag's responses can be seen below under the username, "Blag". As always, any rude or unnecessarily harassing questions may be removed.

Bands in this story

The Dwarves

News (113 comments)

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Fine Print: The following comments are owned by whoever posted them. We are not respon sible for them in any way. Seriously.

GNARTOTHECORE (October 1, 2012)

I kinda got a 2 part question here

1st I'm super stoked to see the Dwarves on the 27th in Miami, but I was hearing from the promoter that HeWhoCannotBeNamed might not be playing the show...what's up with that?

Also, I've been told by a few friends of mine that I look like your long lost son, so...were you in Miami 30 years, slangin your seed around? If so, you owe some child support

misterspike (October 1, 2012)

Churchills! No HeWho? Dwarves Lite?

Blag (Blag Dahlia from The Dwarves) (October 1, 2012)

Son! I've been looking for you! Can you lend me a few bucks, I'm going to FL soon and I need to buy some bug spray?

HeWhoCanNotBeNamed is a Rock Legend! He played with us last month in Oakland, CA, a place even scarier than Florida, unless you're wearing a hoodie!

You just never know when HeWho will show up these days. Sometimes he has to wear that ankle bracelet thing, sometimes, it's his lumbago acting up. Rest assured, even if He dies, He shall be...Born Again!

Blag (Blag Dahlia from The Dwarves) (October 1, 2012)

Fuck that, be rude and harass me!

davebrave4 (October 2, 2012)

Awesome

idonthaveanaccountyet (October 1, 2012)

Why are your shows longer than 10 minutes now?

Blag (Blag Dahlia from The Dwarves) (October 1, 2012)

I loved those 10 minute shows. First of all, we got paid more by the hour back then. Also, there was more time to fuck and get high.

The thing is, now that we have to headline shows sometimes, they want a whole show. So we deliver. But if we ever go past an hour or do an encore, please shoot me.

silverzone (October 1, 2012)

Will there be a new Dwarves album anytime soon? I pretty much listen to The Dwarves Are Born Again almost daily. Its my favorite album out of any band in some time. Anyway thanks for all the music. Great stuff

Blag (Blag Dahlia from The Dwarves) (October 1, 2012)

There will always be a new Dwarves album, Silverzone! We just haven't started making it yet. But the Fresh Prince of Darkness and Chip Fracture have something up their drug addled sleeves I would wager from the way they keep ducking off into the bathroom.

And we're glad you and everybody else loved Born Again. It took 7 years to make, and I didn't try to rap on it!

MN_DrNick (October 1, 2012)

When will you be gracing TV kids shows with your music again? "Do The Sponge" needs a follow up.

Blag (Blag Dahlia from The Dwarves) (October 1, 2012)

Look for the Dwarves to do the theme to 'Ricki Lake Gets plastic surgery really soon.

chewie1234 (October 1, 2012)

Why don't you fuckers EVER play ATL?

Blag (Blag Dahlia from The Dwarves) (October 1, 2012)

These fuckers love ATL! Dirty Souf!

Misanthropee (October 1, 2012)

What's your drug of choice?

Blag (Blag Dahlia from The Dwarves) (October 1, 2012)

Free drugs are the best kind. Hallucinogens, so you have an excuse later.

CostaRicanPunk (October 1, 2012)

Blag, 2 things:

1. I'm going to catch you guys at the funfunfun fest in Austin in November. Do you enjoy playing those festivals with such indie boring bands? Althoug Napalm Death will also be there?

2. When are you getting your ass to Costa Rica? Free booze, girls and all kinds of crazy mushrooms on sight, just ask Fat Mike.

Blag (Blag Dahlia from The Dwarves) (October 1, 2012)

Costa Rican Punk- 2 Things

1. If the bands at a Fest are good, than that's a good thing, because there are good bands. If there are bad bands, that's a good thing, because we will be so much better than them. Plus it's Austin, so you can't go wrong.

2. Send us plane tickets, Motherfucker!

MN_DrNick (October 1, 2012)

What do you tell all the PC people that are against your music and art work and etc.?

Blag (Blag Dahlia from The Dwarves) (October 1, 2012)

I'd tell them, "Excuse me, you appear to have my dick in your mouth!"

Michael_Berryman (October 1, 2012)

what's your favorite drink?

what's your favorite time you were arrested?

also, fuck you.

Blag (Blag Dahlia from The Dwarves) (October 1, 2012)

Free!

Not Free!

You're free to go fuck yourself!

Michael_Berryman (October 1, 2012)

hooray!

mclz (October 1, 2012)

What was the origin of having naked women on the cover of your records? Was it originally just for shock value or and then you decided to just stick with it or is there something else behind it?

Blag (Blag Dahlia from The Dwarves) (October 1, 2012)

Ask Leonardo DaVinci or Raphael. Looking at naked women is the best thing you can do, besides fucking them. And it's way more hygienic.

Skibz777 (October 1, 2012)

I lack the intellect to make up a decent question, so I just wanted to tell you how wonderful you are and that your contributions to the arts are one of the few things that make this cesspit of a society tolerable.

However, I don't want to feel like a complete buffoon by leaving on just that, so I'll swipe a generic question from the last one of these Q&A dealies out of obligation: what are some of your favorite musical artists/albums that would surprise most fans?

Michael_Berryman (October 1, 2012)

i echo this sentiment/question.

Blag (Blag Dahlia from The Dwarves) (October 1, 2012)

Thank you, Skibz777, I live for comments like yours. You're the opposite of a hater, you're a lover, or at the very least, a liker. Why bother with shit that you hate?

Influences that would surprise? I watch Glee every week. I was in 'Babes in Arms' and 'Oliver'. Is that gay enough for you?

skibz777 (October 1, 2012)

I was in 'My Fair Lady' once, so it's all good. It always benefits to have a background in musical theatre.

johngentile (john g.) (October 1, 2012)

I heard that all the Dwarves songs are ghostwritten by Justin Bieber and Selena Gomez. Is that true?

Blag (Blag Dahlia from The Dwarves) (October 1, 2012)

It was the only way I could get a hand job out of her!

seth_uber_alles (October 1, 2012)

Yeah but what about Selena Gomez? HAW HAW

cpp_ (October 1, 2012)

1) Any chance of seeing The Dwarves in Canada?
2) Will you do another solo album? The last one was great.

Blag (Blag Dahlia from The Dwarves) (October 1, 2012)

1) We love Canada, just did Pouzze Fest Montreal, Calgary and Vancouver in May. I'm a maple booster. Very attractive white girls up there with a smattering of Asians. And they getfree health care when I infect them.

2) If you mean the solo ep from 1995, then thank you. That was pretty much the Dwarves though. I think I was hallucinating that my name would be perceived as 'safer' or something o we could get another record deal. As it happened, I had to change it back to get the record deal. (Now, the question would be- what's a record deal?)

Look for some of my goofy acoustic comedy stuff to come out soon on vinyl. Stupid songs about dirty things, improvisations, unlistenable raps, that kind of thing...

MN_DrNick (October 1, 2012)

Best pick up line used on the ladies?

Blag (Blag Dahlia from The Dwarves) (October 1, 2012)

Blag the Ripper, bitch. Recognize!

misterspike (October 1, 2012)

When the Dwarves are Rightfully Inducted into the "Rock and Roll Hall of Fame" (for whatever it's worth) .... who will you have do the induction, and what songs will you play at the ceremony? And would HeWho wear a black tie with his mask and jockstrap? Class.

Blag (Blag Dahlia from The Dwarves) (October 1, 2012)

I want it to be Gwen Stefani, so I can look down her dress. Songs played- Everybodies Girl, Fuck You Up and Get High, Salt Lake City and Let's Just Get High and Fuck Some Sluts!

Blag (Blag Dahlia from The Dwarves) (October 1, 2012)

Oh, and HeWho better be buck naked so he can piss on Eric Clapton!

lushj (October 1, 2012)

Will your ode to Anne Frank ever be recorded and released?

That song really separates the women from the girls!

Blag (Blag Dahlia from The Dwarves) (October 1, 2012)

I still think Anne Frank was hot, in a Sarah Silverman kind of a way. When that song is released, I will offically burn in Hell with no hope of redemption.

lushj (October 1, 2012)

You have hopes of redemption?

mclz (October 1, 2012)

Why did you sign with Epitaph in the mid 90s? Was it because it was the "punk" thing to do?

lushj (October 1, 2012)

Or was it because Mr. Brett was on crack?

mclz (October 1, 2012)

That's what I'm assuming the reply might be.

Blag (Blag Dahlia from The Dwarves) (October 1, 2012)

Brett gave us a lot of money which I will always be grateful for. It was the next 3 years that were kind of retarded. But I dig Brett and always told him how cool I thought it was that he was on dope and still so much smarter than everyone else.

Incidentally, I came up with a great name for the next Bad Religion album- SUPERCALIFRAGILISTICEXPEALIDOPESICK

Any takers?

pufferfish (October 1, 2012)

Why were the next 3 years kind of retarded? Give us the scoopz, Blag!

gettingdown (October 1, 2012)

Detail the first time you had sex with another person.

Blag (Blag Dahlia from The Dwarves) (October 1, 2012)

I rubbed on this cute little blond Jewish girl, until I came in my pants. I don't think I could honestly say it was as good for her as it was for me.

exilesamongyouyouyou (October 1, 2012)

Blag,

I remember reading something a while back about forthcoming reissues of some of your earlier stuff like Lick It and Horror Stories.
Are these in the works, and if so, will there be any extras of any kind?

Blag (Blag Dahlia from The Dwarves) (October 1, 2012)

Big question here!

Yes, Young and Good Looking is coming out as a double record. It's the whole original record, single cuts, my solo ep Venus With Arms, a bunch of the How to Win Friends album and a live radio show on KZSU Stanford with the Y & GL lineup that destroys!

Also, look for reissues of Lick It, Free Cocaine, etc. in different wacky forms with new songs and versions in there.

The next one coming is a vinyl version of Penetration Moon, my lost glam band from the 90s! Earl Lee Grace Blackgrass record, all kinds of reissues in fact...

And in case you didn't know this link-

http://thedwarves.bandcamp.com/

has every Dwarves song ever for streaming and a bunch of great cheap downloads. So go get some cool shite you haven't heard yet, pubnker!

exilesamongyouyouyou (October 1, 2012)

Thanks Blag!

Will the reissues be on Vinyl & CD, or just Vinyl?

alex101 (October 1, 2012)

Dexter Holland of The Offspring made guest appearances on The Dwarves' last two albums "The Dwarves Must Die" and "The Dwarves Are Born Again". What's it like working with him, Blag?

alex101 (October 1, 2012)

Are you friends with him? Tell me about your experience working with Dexter.

Blag (Blag Dahlia from The Dwarves) (October 1, 2012)

Dexter is super cool, smart, funny and rich. He drives his own fucking plane! You've got to love that, unless you're Al Gore.

And Dexter has been super cool about appearing on Dwarves records. He has a kind of voice that the rest of us don't, it works really well on some stuff. I like to hear him mock MTV on the track Massacre, too!

alex101 (October 1, 2012)

Cool. Are you going to invite him to do some singing on the next Dwarves record?

Skibz777 (October 1, 2012)

Screw that, Blag should sing the next Offspring record.

mclz (October 1, 2012)

I knew a lady named Nancy Dahlia from Highland Park, Illinois. Are you related?

Blag (Blag Dahlia from The Dwarves) (October 1, 2012)

No, but I come from Highland Park. My real name is Rufus T. Firefly III.

sexdrugspunkrocknroll (October 1, 2012)

I've noticed that during your sets, you mostly play classic Dwarves songs but the newer records have been pretty experimental. Are you guys ever going to make a "back-to-basics" type record? P.S. Last time I saw u guys, you played w/ Nashville Pussy. Live show is still amazing!

Blag (Blag Dahlia from The Dwarves) (October 1, 2012)

Several Dwarves like Chip Fracture and Clint Torres say a back to basics record is the way to go. Sounds like a consensus is building...

sexdrugspunkrocknroll (October 1, 2012)

Well, Blood, Guts & Pussy is not only a great punk rock record but a great fuckin rock 'n roll record, period!

Tudor (October 1, 2012)

Why are The Dwarves so much better than my band?

Blag (Blag Dahlia from The Dwarves) (October 1, 2012)

How much time do we have here...

pufferfish (October 1, 2012)

Any cool Kurt Cobain stories? Did Courtney Love have him killed, or what?

Blag (Blag Dahlia from The Dwarves) (October 1, 2012)

Great songwriter, bad taste in drugs and women. We played with them in Seattle 1991 pre Nevermind with Dan Peterson on drums. That's why Dwarves are OG- Original Grunge. Act Like You Know!

Courtney never appealed to me. Her arms are too long or something...

Misanthropee (October 1, 2012)

Hopefully that means she can actually reach the trigger...?

Michael_Berryman (October 1, 2012)

Blag i just want to let you know that i am a huge fan and i didn't actually mean it when i said fuck you. i was just being rude because you told me to and punknews told me not to.

and Runaway is one of the greatest songs ever written. so thank you.

Blag (Blag Dahlia from The Dwarves) (October 1, 2012)

Thank HeWhoCanNotBeNamed for Runaway Michael, that's his track all the way.

808budds (October 1, 2012)

Will you do a solo set in my hotel room?

Blag (Blag Dahlia from The Dwarves) (October 1, 2012)

Yes. Meet me there in 15 minutes.

808budds (October 1, 2012)

nice, how about at Fest?

eazyd2 (October 1, 2012)

hey firstly your band sucks. secondly how old are you 50? ever think maybe its time to grow the fuck up you poser

Blag (Blag Dahlia from The Dwarves) (October 1, 2012)

Firstly, your grammar sucks. And old as I am, I still get my cock worshipped on the regular, something a little piss ant like yourself knows nothing about.

You spelled poseur wrong, but I guess after 28 years of playing punk music for dipshits, that's what I am. Enjoy mom's pot roast tonight, Billy!

eazyd2 (October 1, 2012)

only posers spell poser poseur you fucking poser

MN_DrNick (October 2, 2012)

Awwww. Poor little Tristan. He got owned by Blag.

Night has been made.

Tudor (October 1, 2012)

Hahah, Eazy got owned by Blag. I'm not saying that in a butt kissing, I like The Dwarves kind of way, that was actually funny.

Tudor (October 1, 2012)

Is "Working class hole" a true story?

Blag (Blag Dahlia from The Dwarves) (October 1, 2012)

Yes, brilliant as I am, I have no education or job history to speak off. We wanted to make a working class guy song that explained what a bunch of idiots working class guys are!

pufferfish (October 1, 2012)

Which Dwarves record are you most proud of?

Blag (Blag Dahlia from The Dwarves) (October 1, 2012)

Blood Guts, Young and Good Looking and Must Die in no particular order. But that's just me.

sexdrugspunkrocknroll (October 1, 2012)

Where can I get a copy of Loren Cass?

Blag (Blag Dahlia from The Dwarves) (October 1, 2012)

Obscure art film from Tampa St. Pete, worth checking out. No idea how to get it, but good luck!

GNARTOTHECORE (October 1, 2012)

Netflix has it...just get it from them, & return another DVD in the sleeve, keep Loren Cass. I've done this with a few movies & have never been contacted or charged from them about it

sexdrugspunkrocknroll (October 1, 2012)

Thanks!

skibz777 (October 1, 2012)

You've had dwarves on your album covers. Is it more rewarding working with short people or very tall people (7'+)? I like to imagine it's the former. 'Willow' is one of my favorite movies.

Blag (Blag Dahlia from The Dwarves) (October 1, 2012)

Short people are just like you and me. Except, they get more snickers and pointing than us.

pufferfish (October 1, 2012)

Do you and Josh Homme still have beef? What do you think of the guy?

Blag (Blag Dahlia from The Dwarves) (October 1, 2012)

Being transgendered can be difficult, but he's trying.

drHankMcCoy (October 2, 2012)

Dayme!

sexdrugspunkrocknroll (October 1, 2012)

Aside from the Dwarves (duuuuuh!), who do you think is the band making music right now? Punk or other.

sexdrugspunkrocknroll (October 1, 2012)

*best

Blag (Blag Dahlia from The Dwarves) (October 1, 2012)

Quit Your Day Job from Malmo Sweden!

Half_Idiot (October 1, 2012)

"any rude or unnecessarily harassing questions may be removed. "

Even with Blag? I mean come on.

skibz777 (October 1, 2012)

Since it's your namesake, do you have any theories on who the Black Dahlia murderer was? And is it wrong that I thought Elizabeth Short was hotter mutilated than alive? O_o

Blag (Blag Dahlia from The Dwarves) (October 1, 2012)

Yes, it's wrong!

Skibz777 (October 1, 2012)

Dante3000 (rich) (October 1, 2012)

Your live shows are known for being completely unpredictable (often destructive), what band have you toured with that best compliments The Dwarves and have you ever felt like you've been upstaged by an opener?

Blag (Blag Dahlia from The Dwarves) (October 1, 2012)

The Bronx was a good opener, but they couldn't upstage us until they donned those sombreros.

sexdrugspunkrocknroll (October 1, 2012)

Are you going to be in The Other F Word Part II?

misterspike (October 1, 2012)

What did you think of Billie Joe's "meltdown"?

GNARTOTHECORE (October 1, 2012)

Tiny dick battle: HeWhoCannotBeNamed vs. GG Allin....any thoughts?

justlikedelilah (October 1, 2012)

Hi there, Blag. I've never heard of you or your band. Can you please tell me why all my friends are bonering super hard over you? Also, how relevant is your band? Are you as good and/or better than Propagandhi? Who do you thinks gonna win the game tonight?

mclz (October 1, 2012)

Yankees

justlikedelilah (October 1, 2012)

Are you 420 friendly

Yves (October 1, 2012)

Hey !

When are you coming back to France guys ?

jamitha (October 1, 2012)

Oh hi there. First of all, I should mention that you're my hero. Secondly, I should mention that I have super low standards.

Also, "Nina" was a fantastic book. When are you writing your next book? Will it involve a fake porn star autobiography. I hope so.

Much love from NY.
Jamie

Blag (Blag Dahlia from The Dwarves) (October 2, 2012)

Kids, don't forget- www.thedwarves.com has all the tour dates, dirty pics, free songs, videos, merchandise and lies about the Dwarves. Go visit right now. And tell 'em your funny Uncle Blag sent ya!

Blag (Blag Dahlia from The Dwarves) (October 2, 2012)

RadioLikeYouWant.com is the place to go for my podcast with Mike Routhier. We talk shit, play songs and talk to semi famous people. Free downloads and song lists so check that shite out!

owneroperator (October 1, 2012)

And now it's time for "Doin' Crimes' with your favourite host owneroperator!
The segment where we ask your favourite musician for their deepest darkest secret!
Jeff, Have you ever stolen something from a store? Or do you have anything else you'd like to admit to us? Are you an outlaw? Bonus points for a story to accompany the answer.

owneroperator (October 1, 2012)

Sorry for callnig you Jeff, I just stole this post from the BTMI interview.

Skibz777 (October 1, 2012)

I like how Mr. Dahlia didn't even say goodbye. I like to imagine that he was just typing away at his computer and then suddenly screamed "F*** THIS S***!" and walked off mid-sentence. That, or the people who owned the house he had broken into returned. Either way, this was a delightful Q&A. Thanks.

Heathbar (October 2, 2012)

These are great. Good work, Buzzmedia employees.

davebrave4 (October 2, 2012)

Goddammit, I keep missing these things. Let's get some advance warning next time!