DOUCHE?!!!!

god, maybe they had to use a number to abbreviate their website.'suck it bitches'!

JESSE SAID:
To anyone who is perturbed by the way I wrote my review, all I have to say is this: I wrote the review. You want a different type of review? Write one.

COT DEATH SAYS:
Challenge accepted. I think you'll find it is a reasonably fair (considering I have connections with the band) and intelligent review based upon actually listening beyond any musical prejudices I may hold (I'm not a Saves the Day fan either). I could (and sometimes do) write in the smart-but-dumb polemic style you've adopted here, but like to think I do so with a little more originality than just picking on the band's name as my 'irrelevant-fact-by-which-to-make-sweeping-generalisations.'

S HORTCUT TO NEWARK
Heads in Hands; Hearts in Half CD/ 7” VINYL EP
Boss Tuneage/ Rock ‘em Dead Records
Shortcut to Newark play feelgood boy-sings-about-girl emo-rock with an overall sound akin to Brandston or Saves the Day. Featuring the two frontmen from the now defunct Shooter McGavin, the overlapping dual vocal harmonies are a major plus point for Shortcut. Compared to Shooter, the sound here is downtempo, more rock-based and the punky stop-startiness has been replaced by more complex audio layering. Lying just beneath the surface are hints of Squeeze melodies or the driving basslines of Thin Lizzy, which, coupled with some nifty lead guitar embelishments, make the band sound in places like a more credible version of The Darkness. Any one of these four tracks could sit in the date/ romance montage of an 80s teen movie, or perhaps as the soundtrack to the title fight in a karate tournament. COT DEATH CHRIS.
www.shortcut2newark.co.uk

Point taken, Jesse, that you have every right to your opinions, and if you're paying for the material you review then more power to you. All I can say is that reviewing is not an ivory tower, so as long as people have their own views they have every right to challenge the points you make and, effectively, review you, the reviewer.

Actually, they used a number to abbreviate their website because it's easier to read than www.shortcuttonewark.co.uk. Isn't it?

Jonathan Jefferies
webmaster@shortcut2newark.co.uk

I`m in this band and basically we are not and don`t want anything we do to sound like punk, we are an indie rock band from England.We don`t sit well with punkers anyway.Also this is an e.p, since when has a 4 track c.d been an album?! I don`t know why the fuck we`ve been reviewed on this site. There are tons of excellent reviews on the web on other sites written by music lovers, not punk lovers.

I'm sorry, but I can't take any review that contains the phrase "suck it, bitches" seriously.

this album really isn't good, but atmosphere is.

A) I'm lazy.
B) I'm poor.
C) If you care that much, find your own damn copy.

Peace, I'm out.

Hey Jesse, was that a challenge? Mail me the CD at cost from England and I will review it, how about that?

Just because I mention two amazing guitar players doesn't mean that think they are the only two that can play well.

Dimebag Darrell is the third.

I didn't realize there were rules distinguishing guitar soloing from electric wanking.

Okay, imagine this... BEFORE Jimi Hendrix, Jimmy Page, and Eddie Van (ugh) there were solos in rock songs. I know, that's such a weird idea to grasp.

And guitar wankery isn't some guy pulling off a 5 second solo, it's leaving the melody of a song for anything over 30 seconds just to show how well you can work your fingers. No one's impressed.

-BSD

What crawled into BSD's BVD's and died? This isn't a great review, but Jesse wasn't that far off the mark with his Eddie Van Halen comment. There's waaaaay too much self-indulgent guitar wankery out there.

I know it's been said that this review isn't exactly top-knotch and shit, but I'm taking particular offense in the way you went out of your way to hate on Slug.

BSD had you dead-on with the Black Flag comment.

Wow...so the Newark joke just DID NOT go over well. People are being overly critical about that part.

"What kind of name is Jesse?"

-Biblical. He was David's father. Which is even funnier, since it means "God lives," and I'm an atheist.

I'm just not even going to reply to BSD's remarks anymore.

Dear Jesse,

I wanted to write to you to say I think your review was shitty. Not only was it inaccurate and sloppy, but it came over as rather stupid. Stating a melodic rock band as good as Shoercut... sound like New Found Glory shows that you didn't really listen to the CD. If you actually did pop your CD in the player you'd have realised that while STN aren't the best band in the world, they played emotional rock driven by some pretty sweet melodies. There's even an underlying British sound thrown in their for good measure. Remember bands like Leatherface? Yeah, they're British. And they influenced a whole range of US wannabe punk bands.

Making ridiculous points about the band's name makes you look even sillier. Of course there's a Newark in the UK! There's a New York too. Infact I think you'll find YOU ripped off the UK names hundreds of years after they were named here.

Anyway, anyone that reads your review will know you are a Grade A moron anyway, so I don't need to write anty more.

Best wishes,

David.

Ps - What kind of a name is Jesse anyway?

"Look, unless you're Eddie Van Halen or Hendrix or whomever, don't solo. You just sound dumb. You're not as good as them"

That's possibly the dumbest thing ever written on this site.

You obviously don't like punk, so stop reviewing here. Go review at "pseudointelectualtrendykid.org".

Eddie Van was technically proficient, yes, but he did nothing interesting at any point in his career. Even though it's pretty much common knowledge to anyone who likes music, Van Halen were 100% suck until the day they broke up. Tasteless music for brainless Americans... Furthermore, by telling people who aren't prodigies at their instrument not to solo, you make yourself sound like a pompous, dino-rock bafoon. Imagine Black Flag without those quirky solos, Discharge minus the one-noters that shred through the thundering drum and bass...

Go away. Everyone hates your reviews, but not in a funny "haha look at them be ignorant" way, they hate them because you are a shitty reviewer.

-BSD

More shitty UK pop-punk, but that review reeks of ignorance/borderline xenophobia.

-BSD

To anyone who is perturbed by the way I wrote my review, all I have to say is this:

I wrote the review. You want a different type of review? Write one.

After listening to the songs on purevolume, this band reminds me a lot of mid-90s pop-punk...it's not bad, but it's definitely not good.

I don't think anyone is moaning about this dude having an opinion, it's the way he expressed it. I mean come on,. making reference to their name is really dumb. We had a Newark before the US did! It's just a typical Yank opinion - you think you rule the fucking world! If you don't like the CD, then fine. But it doesn't sound anything like New Found Glory or any of the bands listed in the review. It's stupid. Boss Tuneage is a fucking great label and to slag them off by spouting such shit is disgusting.

the problem wasn't his opinion of the album - the problem was his reasoning. Jesse tends to assume people play music only to "expand the horizons." Honestly, it gets old when evey review he writes focuses on the music industry as a whole rather than the album presented.

It's funny that you all assume that a reviewer can't have their own opinion, just because you disagree. The review was fine, and this type of music is boring anyway.

I think that is quite possibly the worst review I have ever read, and it goes to prove that Americans really are as dumb as us UK folk think you are.

Jesse -

Don't be a douche. Complex doesn't always mean great, and simplicity isn't synonymous with boring. If I were getting albums for free to review, I don't think I'd ever get quite that angry.

lol there's at least 5 newarks in the UK mate. Remember, America is a colony and alot of the names are taken from Uk and European countries. Hence new YORK, aberdeen, dunblane, glasgow, hamburg, paris etc etc etc. the list goes on and on.

A floating turd of a review...what is it with you people, you can't understand that people are going to make this kind of music because they want to make this kind of music? You can't comprehend that a growing number of young people are feeling this kind of music, and want to do it for themselves? So what if it's crappy, review something more worthwhile. Piece a shit.

I think the anger is actually part of the review. It's like the movie Falling Down where you see this fed up yuppie gradually go violently insane.

I take your word on the album being bad, but you let your anger make you write a terrible review

boobus