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Paris, Texas - Like You Like An Arsonist (Cover Artwork)

Paris, Texas

Paris, Texas: Like You Like An ArsonistLike You Like An Arsonist (2004)
New Line

Reviewer Rating: 1.5


Contributed by: maverickScott
(others by this writer | submit your own)

When I was barely into double digits, I had my first can of Mountain Dew. I couldn't believe what was hitting my lips: It was unbelievably refreshing, energizing, and bright. The wide-mouth can allowed me to guzzle the twelve ounces of this miracle liquid down my throat faster than I ever could h.
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When I was barely into double digits, I had my first can of Mountain Dew. I couldn't believe what was hitting my lips: It was unbelievably refreshing, energizing, and bright. The wide-mouth can allowed me to guzzle the twelve ounces of this miracle liquid down my throat faster than I ever could have with any other beverage. I was in love.

So I saved up my money and bought a whole twelve-pack of cans. And one by one, I drank them in succession. Knowing how much I enjoyed my first experience, I figured my next dozen would be just as good. Right? Wrong. The sticky sweet taste got to be just too sickening over the course of twelve cans, and the dyes in the liquid coated my throat to the point where I didn't even realize that I was drinking it anymore. This stuff was so glossy and mass-produced that it was doing nothing but make me sick to my stomach.

The new album from Paris, Texas is that twelve-pack of Mountain Dew. Take a gem like "Hip Replacement" or "Action Fans Help Us" by itself, and you'll enjoy Paris, Texas' pure pop-rock goodness with a crazy knack for catchy hooks. But as soon as you try to digest this whole album, you'll end up praying to the porcelain god of music, as your ears won't be able to take the ridiculously studio-polished guitar tone and almost computerized vocals emitting from your speakers. The album is trying too hard to be mass-produced and commercialized; the aural equivilant of Mountain Dew. This disc wants to be in every 16-year-old's first new car as they speed out of the high school parking lot to their minimum wage job, encouraging the kid to "stick it to the man" with songs like "Bombs Away" and "Rebel Radio" [one thing this disc definitely is not].

Frankly, Paris, Texas has been all downhill ever since their first 7" - it's just taken the polishing of a faux-major in New Line Records to really bring their mediocrity to the foreground through an engineer who got way too trigger-happy recording this disc. Go track down the demo of "Hip Replacement" from a few years back and put it on "repeat" - it's all you'll ever need to hear from this record.

MP3s
One Hot Coma
Like You Like An Arsonist

 


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Fine Print: The following comments are owned by whoever posted them. We are not respon sible for them in any way. Seriously.
Anonymous (August 27, 2004)

This album is much better than the review suggests. It's a little bit like the new Authority Zero - a perfectly serviceable piece of sugar-free rock to fill the gap before the more innovative, meaningful albums of the fall. And I, for one, would consider it an improvement over older P,T efforts, although it is overproduced.

OC

Anonymous (August 1, 2004)

I hate texas

Anonymous (July 27, 2004)

sooo not good.

Anonymous (July 27, 2004)

"mountain dew is by far the greatest soft drink on Earth"

you forgot to end with the words "not named Cherry Coke."

Anonymous (July 26, 2004)

this stuff is not good.

Anonymous (July 26, 2004)

The only song you really need to hear by Paris, Texas is "My week beats your year." Score is for that song -- I didn't even know this band still existed!

Anonymous (July 25, 2004)

Album isnt that great, but Mountain Dew is by far the greatest soft drink on earth!

Anonymous (July 25, 2004)

i liked it

-benz

Anonymous (July 25, 2004)

This is a horrible review

Anonymous (July 25, 2004)

The only soft drink that can be consumed in large amounts without making one sick is root beer.

opivykid (July 24, 2004)

Aboot Mountain Dew : NEVER, and I mean NEVER drink 16 liters of it, in less than a day and a half, while you have the Flu. One of the stupidest things i've ever done, as I got pretty damn sick. Score's for Mountain Dew...

kirbypuckett (July 24, 2004)

I guess I agree with Scott on this, but I still dig it.

blaubs21 (July 24, 2004)

i think this album is fantastic, but compared to what it could have been, it's definitely disappointing.

TheMarc (July 24, 2004)

I'd rather have a beer.

logan (July 24, 2004)

This band took way too long to put this out. And now that it's out, it's fucking horrible. I really liked "Brazilliant" the EP on Polyvinyl aways back but.. this is just horrible.

Anonymous (July 24, 2004)

BSD should get a life really. I'ts important
Not only do you talk to much, despite the fact no-one really gives a shit what you think, but you talk complete donkey bollocks most of the time. FFS - just go and stick your head in the nearest gas oven.

lostinthecrowd13 (July 24, 2004)

Scores for the mountain dew comments. Great Review. Never had the desire to listen to Paris, Texis and I just happened to click on this cuz I was bored at 2 AM but the way you wrote the first two paragraphs made me wanna read about this band.

theOneTrueBill (July 24, 2004)

Those first paragraphs are pure gold.

Anonymous (July 24, 2004)

score is for the cover art.

Anonymous (July 24, 2004)

I don't know what I'm supposed to be doing at 11:30 at night in Kansas City besides watching TV.

I play a lot of volleyball, though.

Jesse (July 24, 2004)

BSD-

You're the first comment on like everyone of these reviews? Do you have a life?

Well, I don't either. That's why I reply to all of your posts.

Anonymous (July 24, 2004)

I was referring to BSD's comment.... eh

Anonymous (July 24, 2004)

i'm not understanding how people liking a drink, and people liking a scene of music are comparable at all.

Anonymous (July 24, 2004)

That's one of the saddest and most anti-punk statements that I've read

Anonymous (July 24, 2004)

Mountain Dew really rots your teeth more than any soft drink out there.

And now you know...

OKSoda (July 24, 2004)

Mountain Dew is terrible.

BSD (July 24, 2004)

Mountain Dew is like hardcore, or punk rock in general- it was cool before the wrong people got into it.

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