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3 Inches of Blood

Advance and Vanquish (2004)
Roadrunner Records

Reviewer Rating:

Contributed by: elliot
(others by this writer | submit your own)

Published on September 25th 2005

There’s probably no way that you can be indifferent to a band like 3 Inches of Blood. Their over-the-top, modern-day Manowar style usually polarizes people into those who worship it, and those who despise it. Generalizations can be harsh, but I think it’s safe to say that if you don’t like 3 Inches of Blood, then you don’t like fun. Because that’s exactly what Advance and Vanquish is: A big load of fun.

The first thing about 3 Inches of Blood that jumps out is obviously the vocals, most notably those of Cam Pipes. His high-pitched, wailing vibrato of a voice might seem ridiculous at first, but it proves to be quite a weapon. There’s no arguing that Pipes can’t sing. When he hits the highest of high notes, it’s as if the gods of metal are smiling down upon him. Nicely complimenting Pipes’ vocals is Jamie Hooper’s straight-forward but powerful screams.

With all the warrior imagery and outrageous vocals, 3 Inches of Blood could easily be a disaster, but the strong musicianship throughout Advance and Vanquish holds everything together. Every single track is built on great guitar riffs and rock-solid rhythm. Somehow, they make power metal songs into a format that’s even catchier than an Ashlee Simpson song. You might find a lot of this getting mercilessly stuck in your head, and you’ll love every second of it.

Advance and Vanquish does have one flaw: Its length. 13 tracks at 50 minutes does get a bit tiring, especially when it’s pretty much the same sound the entire time. After about 9 or 10 tracks, the album has pretty much done all it can do, and then it goes on for a few more tracks. 3 Inches of Blood’s lack of musical variation definitely has something to do with this, but that lack of variation is probably something they’re proud of. I’m sure they see no reason to deviate from a formula that works so well.

If it really seems necessary to talk shit on 3 Inches of Blood, then knock yourself out. I doubt they even care. It’s obvious that these are just young dudes who love to play metal the old-fashioned way, with no fancy breakdowns or modern tricks thrown in. They’re metal purists, which is something you don’t get a lot of these days. So if you’re feeling down and you need to become a mighty warrior in a hurry, then Advance and Vanquish is the perfect soundtrack to your battle.

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hazard (October 30, 2006)

Anyone who fucking appreciates old school real metal not bullshit ala-"Slipknot angst ridden shit" will love this album. Really sweet release. I love to hear their next release.

Anonymous (March 27, 2006)

Anyone who cites "...swords and pirates..." as influences is alright in my book. Best album i've heard in years.

Anonymous (March 12, 2006)

all these guys are dumbasses 3 inches rocks!!

Anonymous (October 21, 2005)

Love your review!! Except for the comment about the lenth. A real album should be as long as true metal heads can listen. BUt any ways 3 inches is the greatest band. live and on album. Ive seen them 4 time and they will rock your socks off!!

Anonymous (September 28, 2005)

more like 3 inches of limp dick

jamespastepunk (September 26, 2005)

Axes of Evil!!!

Anonymous (September 26, 2005)

Let's stick to reviewing albums, not bands.

...Because God knows there's no corrolation.

-Johnny K.

hushearthling (September 26, 2005)

Seriously, this sounds like the Metal I listened to in elementary school. Sounds like Painkiller era Priest at it's best. And I guarantee 90% of people who hear this record will HATE it. But it quickly became one of my faves.

AlmostPunkEnough (September 26, 2005)

i've pondered that many times, jones.

like, if it's a glass of blood, 3 inches isn't much at all. but what if it's like sweat in a warehouse frat party? 3 inches over a few thousand cubic feet is a shitload of globules.

stevejonestherealbones (September 26, 2005)

i like that art. reminds me of that fantasy artist boris or whatever.

anyway. thats alot of blood depending on what its contained in

- jones the bones

- stevejones8770@yahoo.com

AlmostPunkEnough (September 26, 2005)

jesus christ, Will, it's tounge in cheek.

the funniest part is the kids who love them who really do think they're serious. of course the dudes in the band enjoy the music and subject matter, but it's supposed to be something of a joke, interviews and all.

Anonymous (September 25, 2005)

They actually take themselves completely seriously. They aren't a joke band whatsoever, and don't think they're "just having fun." I've read a review where they were pissed at people who dismissed them as a funny metal band.

What a bunch of wankstains.

-Will

Anonymous (September 25, 2005)

I haven't been into these guys since they signed to Roadrunner and everyone one except the two singers quit the band. I've been curious to hear this album though.

mikeinflames (September 25, 2005)

this album is bunk ... plain and simple

Anonymous (September 25, 2005)

deffinatly one of the best metal cds i have bought in a while. its true there isnt much variation but ill take that any day over a bunch of monkey dancing breakdowns.

Anonymous (September 25, 2005)

Might be the best album in the past 10 years.

sansx (September 25, 2005)

Let's stick to reviewing albums, not bands.

Anonymous (September 25, 2005)

come on!!

Anonymous (September 25, 2005)

I think they're awesome and like the reviewer said, if you don't like them you must not like fun.

fistchode (September 25, 2005)

They put on a fun live show. Well, I'm not sure if they're big now or not, but when they were a small local band, they put on a fun live show.

xblakeyoung (September 25, 2005)

the new iron maiden!

AlmostPunkEnough (September 25, 2005)

i like this album just for the cheese factor. some really good, if rehased, tunes here and there. i wish the vocals were more Maiden than Priest, though.

Anonymous (September 25, 2005)

This band sucks and so does this CD. Reviving something that was crappy in the first place is a waste of time.

My friend bought this because he thought it would sound like Bolt Thrower... Oops.

-Will