The Cribs - The New Fellas (Cover Artwork)

The Cribs

The Cribs: The New FellasThe New Fellas (2005)

Reviewer Rating: 1.5

Contributed by: JesseJesse
(others by this writer | submit your own)

The Cribs are poised to take over the airwaves! Hey kids, be the latest on your block to pick up this gem! At least, as long as you dig guitar-heavy poppy rock that borders on the new dance. The Cribs are set to be the next British buzz band, following the Libertines, Futureheads, and Bloc Pa.

The Cribs are poised to take over the airwaves!

Hey kids, be the latest on your block to pick up this gem!

At least, as long as you dig guitar-heavy poppy rock that borders on the new dance. The Cribs are set to be the next British buzz band, following the Libertines, Futureheads, and Bloc Party, and describing their sound involves an amalgamation of all those acts, but, you know, radio friendly. I've always felt that the one thing we needed was more radio-friendly rock. Always.

It's hard to listen to the Cribs without feeling like they're just riding a trend. Their songs are formulaic and unoriginal. Their melodies are safe and catchy. What more do you need? A personal stamp of approval from a major magazine? Well, SPIN gave them a writeup for SXSW. Still not proof? How about the charts: "Hey Scenesters" is a Top 30 hit in the UK. Why aren't you worshipping this band right now? Maybe it's just because that they haven't scored the major/hip-indie label contract yet. Oh wait, they're on Bright Eyes', Bloc Party's, and the Yeah Yeah Yeah's old label. Hmmm...still not enough? Well, how about this: They had a song on "The OC!" Okay, that clinched it, I'm convinced! "The OC" accepts only quality music to play on their television program, so of course the Cribs must be awesome!

All in all, this album won't turn any heads, won't start any revolutions, won't matter at all in about six or seven years. So go buy the album if you want, listen to it a few times, enjoy it to the extent that you wish. It's catchy, it's poppy. You'll have a blast. Then you'll forget about it, find the next trend-riders, and hop on board.


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Fine Print: The following comments are owned by whoever posted them. We are not respon sible for them in any way. Seriously.
SilentStorms (November 1, 2005)

Score's for the review, hilarious!

Anonymous (October 30, 2005)

Yeah, no shit. Cribs? Fuck dat. I'm down wit da Crips.


Jesse (October 29, 2005)

I bet anyone fifteen dollars that that isn't really the real Will who posted that last comment.

Anonymous (October 29, 2005)

one of the greatest albums ever


Anonymous (October 28, 2005)

Well first I've never actually heard this album but I've got a few of their songs on my iPod and it's some catchy stuff. Make no mistake, it's meaningless pop music but just because it's not gonna start a revolution or matter in seven years is no reason to shit all over it. Off the top of my head, the last albums that really mattered were 'OK Computer' and 'In the Aeroplane Over the Sea' and lets face it, we can't all be NMH or Radiohead. I find it very irritating when pretentious, self-important reviewers decide to hate bands before ever hearing their music. And clearly, that must've happened here because really there is nothing wrong with the Cribs music (which by the way, sounds nothing like the Futureheads or the Libertines music). Get off your high horse, or pull your head out of your ass or remedy whatever your particular affliction is and learn to write reviews (because, you know, usually they include information about, like, songs and stuff). Because the impression I get is you're too busy catering to the the small collection of people who have their lips firmly attached to your asscheeks to actually listen to a CD before you review it these days.

inagreendase (October 28, 2005)

...or the Editors.

That album is seriously so solid. It'll miss my top 20 by a few spots, but they're probably the best band currently doing the Interpol / Joy Division thing.

adam (October 28, 2005)

Naw Jesse's opinions were fine, he just goes off on a big off topic rant every once in a while. While those are certainly entertaining, if we don't post those sorts of things from you folks we should apply the same rules to ourselves.


Anonymous (October 28, 2005)

oooooo whats with the internal politics at punknews??? i thought people could say what they liked?? sponsers not happy with the reviews?

Anonymous (October 28, 2005)

I completely agree with the guy below. Hardly anyone in the UK cares about these jokers. I thought they were from new york.

Jesse (October 28, 2005)

It's not that I haven't been writing, I just had gotten stuck back in the queue. And I've had to tone down some of the reviews. That's the word from the big boss man.

Anonymous (October 28, 2005)

Speaking as a resident of the UK I 'd like to categorically deny that the Cribs are going to be the next British buzz band.

Seriously, nobody in this country really gives a fuck about them. They have abslutely zero chance of reaching the popularity level of, say, Franz Ferdinand and the Kaiser Chiefs, or even Bloc Party and the Bravery,

If you want to hear some half decent but still mainstream-ish British bands check out the Arctic Monkeys, the Rakes or the Editors.

TheOneTrueBill (October 28, 2005)

Yeah Jesse, what's with the lack of reviews?

the_other_scott (October 28, 2005)

i used to think these guys sucked (actually i still do)

but apparently they toured with the bronx and at least know how to party enough to get kicked out of hotels

maverick (October 28, 2005)

I was reading Jesse's review of that Rocky Denis CD earlier today, and as soon as I got to the "collage monster" part, I started hysterically laughing out loud. God, that was so funny.


Anonymous (October 28, 2005)

Jesse, it has been far too long. If I may critique the review, it is in dire need of a) more swearing and b) more Jesse-ness.

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