The Sidekicks

The Sidekicks are young kids from Cleveland. Real young. I mean, they're not old enough to drink, and if they were stupid, they could still be in high school and it wouldn't be that weird. In fact, if singer, guitarist Steve Ciolek was the one who knocked up Jamie Lynn, it would be legal. Just sayin'. Anyway, where was I? Oh yeah. The Sidekicks are young kids from Cleveland. Actually, they're from outside Cleveland which is even worse, but it apparently makes for good rock and roll. I mean, fuck... (more)

The Sidekicks are young kids from Cleveland. Real young. I mean, they're not old enough to drink, and if they were stupid, they could still be in high school and it wouldn't be that weird. In fact, if singer, guitarist Steve Ciolek was the one who knocked up Jamie Lynn, it would be legal. Just sayin'. Anyway, where was I? Oh yeah. The Sidekicks are young kids from Cleveland. Actually, they're from outside Cleveland which is even worse, but it apparently makes for good rock and roll. I mean, fuck. How do these kids have any fucking perspective at all, much less enough to make a record this fist-pumpingly, finger-pointingly kick ass? I know what you're thinking.and I asked. They say they've never listened to Hot Water Music. I call bullshit on that, but you never know. I mean, when "No Division" came out, these kids were still doing long division. Am I right?!?! Seriously! I'll be here all week, people. Okay, what's this about? Yeah, the Sidekicks have recently released their debut "So Long, Soggy Dog" on Red Scare Industries, and it's somewhere in the neighborhood of the most exciting record around the Midwest, AND they're gonna be touring on it, so hide your sons, because these dongthrobs are coming to a town near you.

"So Long, Soggy Dog" is one of those records that seems like it could only be made by kids. I'm not saying it's on point with Operation Ivy's Energy, okay. That's for the music journalists to say. I'm just saying that it captures that same, well, energy and enthusiasm. What does it sound like? It sounds like a bunch of bearded pissed off guys in the Midwest having the greatest goodbye party of all time. It's the soundtrack to the "Breakfast Club" if it was set at the Fest in Gainesville and everyone was drinking Pabst. It's like if you could understand the words to a Hot Water Music song, or if Against Me! was catchier. It sounds exactly like Cleveland and the outlying areas should sound when filtered through punk rock kids and crappy punk house shows. It smells like Cheeto farts and sweaty balls, but you probably won't get that through the record, thankfully.

You will, however, smell them this summer when they hit the highways to promote themselves as only they can, by playing the songs on this record in the live setting, in crappy houses and crappier clubs all over the contiguous 48. These guys are, not to belabor the point, young, and they're just getting started, and if "So Long, Soggy Dog" is any indication of where they're headed, it would be a good idea to check out the Sidekicks as soon as possible, so when your friend is bragging about seeing New Found Glory in a donut shop in '99, you can finish laughing and tell him about how you saw the Sidekicks back when they were just little kids, before everyone loved 'em. And finally, yeah, we know that there are tons of bands called the Sidekicks. These are the best Sidekicks though, and the only ones worth a shit. Believe me, we checked 'em all out and picked the best, because dammit, I've always wanted to write a bio for a band with that name. Next stop Bungee jumping!