I’ve gone ahead and summarized/paraphrased the info I gathered on this band The Bank Robbers to give you all a quick look at what these guys are like. Peruse at your leisure.

The Bank Robbers
From: NJ
Favorite shirt/hoodie color: black
Favorite pants: tight jeans, cuffed of course
Favorite vice: none please, we’re SxE! (I debated putting this in… they are indeed straight edge, and while I myself could fall into that categorization, their advertising of it on the website even turned me off)
Favorite bands: Thursday, Thrice, Brand New, Taking Back Sunday, Story of the Year, Further Seems Forever, some hardcore too y’know, like Bane or Every Time I Die, and throw in some old band like U2 or the Cure for credibility.
Favorite Memory: Just playing shows with these awesome friends of mine. Making music with them is the best thing ever.

Now- before reading farther, take a minute to make a wild guess at what this band will sound like.

They sound like every screamy emo band from New Jersey that came before them! Did you guess correctly? Oh but don’t worry, they mix it up with a couple old-Dashboard type whiny acoustic songs just to even out all the psuedo metal riffs and lozenge-requiring screams from the other tracks. I did not judge the book by its cover here- I did give this a chance with a few listens, but I may as well just guessed and I would have had this review done sooner. The Bank Robbers make sure to follow all the stereotypes to a ‘t’.

I don’t like to be mean. They seem like good guys, and what they do sounds decent for being on a tighter budget than their larger name heroes. But the songwriting lacks here, and the biggest weakness is the vocals, which are consistently flat when singing, coming through most horrifically on the acoustic tracks (“Your Best Kept Secret” and “The Definition of Beauty”). Overall I could not pick a favorite track, for they all pass by without much notice. Most of the attempts at hooks fail and the attempts at hardcore are unconvincing. I’ve heard this done before and heard it done better. Even other bandwagon jumping bands like Fallout Boy at least have the hooks to catch the ear. Sorry guys.

If your personal favorite bands list looks the same as these boys, and your shelves aren’t already overflowing with emo-screamo-supreamo albums already, The Bank Robbers may be your cup o’ tea. As for the rest of us, pass this up and maybe check back for the next album from them. If they would make the music their own rather than just rehashing, we just may have something here.