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Epitaph Records -- Story of the Year
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Epitaph Records -- Millencolin

It could be worse for the All-American Rejects. So, they were publicly humiliated when they submitted their album to Dreamworks and were ordered to "return with something a lot catchier." So their hired drummer and guitar player publicly criticizes the band's music and admits to only being in it for the money. So what if you're releasing an album that critics and scenesters are already hell-bent on hating? With all that pressure, it would be easy for a band to just call it a day. But on the All-American Rejects second major label release, Move Along, they attempt to do just that, and are successful...sometimes.

Let me start off by saying: Like this record or hate it, you're going to be hearing a lot of it over the next year. With the infectious "Dirty Little Secret" already predestined to be loved by 13-year-old girls everywhere and retired from TRL, you've got a surefire summer radio smash. Songs like the title track "Move Along" also show great potential to do the same thing. So you may as well go ahead and get used to it now. Let's take a glance at the record itself.

The album opens with "Dirty Little Secret," which is what it is, obviously written just to please their label; cheeky, and a catchy as hell power-pop song. The first immediate thing you'll notice on this song, aside from the laughable intro riff, is Tyson's voice sounds undenaibly better. His vocals sound much less nasal on this album, which is a huge plus for listeners. But you'll also notice another thing: While Tyson's voice has matured, his lyrics certianly have not. Sorry Tyson, "I'll keep you my dirty little secret / don’t tell anyone or you’ll be just another regret" is not going to cut it with the in crowd. Still, this song is a great listen, if you like obnoxiously infectious hooks. While this song may be the opener, it definitely does not represent the rest of the album. The next song is "Stab My Back," which sounds very reminiscent of their previous album. While it is a catchy song, once again the lyrics scream "relate to me please." After that comes the title track "Move Along," which if I may say so myself, is an excellent song, and the perfect predecessor as a single to "Dirty Little Secret." You definitely hear some maturity in this song; even if it's only a tiny bit, it's still there.

Next, the album takes a serious dive with the song "It Ends Tonight," an over-emotional mid-tempo ballad that will either put you to sleep or make you cry for hours, depending on your age/race/sex {14-year-old caucasian females, this one is for you}. After that, the album speeds up, thank God. "Change Your Mind" is your typical catchy AAR quiet verses / big anthemic choruses power rock song, which they're beginning to get quite good at making; "And when the sky is falling / don't look outside the window / step back and hear I'm calling / give up, you don't take the fast road." Try to listen to that a few times and not have it stuck in your head the next day. "Night Drive" is by far the heaviest song on the album; although it's still that squeaky-clean AAR sound, it has an undeniable edge in comparison to the other tracks.

The second half of the album opens with the very 80's-sounding "Dance Inside." This song builds up, seemingly forever, and then finallly explodes into a huge catchy anthemic sort-of chorus. Next comes "Top Of The World," which sounds nothing like the AAR of old, and is maybe the standout track of the album. All the credibility AAR built up with that last song just comes crumbling to the ground with "Striaghtjacket Feeling," an acoustic ballad that for lack of a better word really, really sucks. "Etched with marks but I can't heal / and you're the problem but you can't feel" Tyson cries on this disaster. “I’m Waiting” is a very enjoyable song, but nothing mind-blowing. The album closes with “Can't Take It,” an odd orchestra balled that is at times endearing, and at others just awkward. Every track on this album is basically a hit or miss and “Can't Take It” definitely falls into the latter.

After listening to Move Along, one word immediately comes into mind: potential. This band has endless potential. If they would ever fully embrace their pop-rock sound that makes them so lovable, they could be a great band. And more importantly, if Tyson could ever learn to write lyrics...

Best Track: "Top Of The World"

Legal Disclaimer: Some of the assertions in this review are not verified.



People who liked this also liked:
From First to Last - HeroineAmerican Heritage - Through the Age of Quarrel andAmerican Hi-Fi - Hearts On ParadeAmerica Is Waiting - In the Lines [reissue]American Steel - Jagged ThoughtsAmerican Steel - Destroy Their FutureAmerican Football - American FootballAll-American Rejects - All-American RejectsAll-American Rejects - Live From Oklahoma... The Too Bad For Hell DVDHawthorne Heights - If Only You Were Lonely



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    Posted by fugazifreak on 2007-05-02 21:42:28
    My Score:

    I'll give the guys credit the lead singer is a hottie

    Posted by pinkerton on 2007-01-09 05:20:17

    look at the "other albums people liked"

    heroine?

    fallout boy?

    these bands obviously have no substance. its strange because i first heard this band 6 years ago on a big wheel comp, playing their first radio single. to be honest im not sure what to think. the radio tunes arent too terribly bad, yet through videos, commericals, and interviews i get the impression that this band believes they are the second coming of christ. therefore, i cant bring myself to enjoy their music anymore

    Posted by Peggy-luSparkletoes on 2006-12-18 06:25:24
    My Score:

    I DONT GET IT!!!
    it this review taking the piss out of the album or saying its good!!!
    i totally disagree with this
    i think that "Move along" is a album suited for EVERYONE!
    MY MUM LOVE IT!!!
    all american rejects are top class and i love them!!
    AND I AM 17!!!
    hehe
    xox

    Posted by Apple-loop on 2006-11-28 16:42:14

    For fuck sake!! This gobshite doesn't know what he's talking bout!!! I have this album n i fucking luve it!! Screw this idiot! AAR rock the best band ever!! All their songs are fantastic n i love Tysons voice n hes a brill song writer!!

    WHO'S WITH ME?? :-)

    Posted by ktbaby21404 on 2006-11-13 03:40:24

    I 100% disagree with this review. This entire album show so much growth from the first album. The lyrics arent just fluff like most bands out there. Most of their songs have some deep meaning, especially move along. That song helped get me through a lot, and i somehow doubt that it would have if it was truly just a 3 star song with potential. They rest of the songs are catchy but i dont know why thats viewed as such a negative thing. I dont know about you but i LIKE my songs to be catchy. I thinks its amazing if you can combine catchy and deep in one song.....which they do multiple times here. Annnnd if you ask me secret and regret is a good rhyme and i couldnt think of that on my own. Tyson Ritter is actually an amazing lyricist and i dont think any of us here could do what he does, and he does far better then a lot of the other bands our there who write about shit and dont even make the shit sound good. He doesnt just stick a you and me wait and see sentance together and call it a song, He takes time and thought and comes out with some really great stuff, This is one of my all time favorite albums because of what i have just said and i think it has a lot more then just potential

    Posted by Jim_Neighbors on 2006-09-15 22:30:30

    Poop Tunnel. That would be a good band name

    Posted by totalstranga on 2006-07-26 00:21:06
    My Score:

    is this punk? but since I belive that if I dont have anything nice to say, dont say anything at all, this is ok for a pop record.

    Posted by Anonymous on Monday, June 12, 2006 at 10:58 PM (EDT)
    My Score:

    this band sucks ass they r the all american fucking REJECTS.FUCKING REJECTS THEY SUPER SUCK ASS!!!

    Posted by Anonymous on Sunday, May 7, 2006 at 12:15 PM (EDT)

    all american rejects are the best band EVER!!!!!!!!!!!1

    Posted by Anonymous on Wednesday, May 3, 2006 at 12:30 PM (EDT)

    Are you gay tyson R?

    Posted by ilovesonny on 2006-05-02 16:03:58
    My Score:

    I want to know tyson's dirty little secret on
    how he gets into those pants!!!!!!!!!
    i love you tyson!!!!

    Posted by Anonymous on Friday, April 28, 2006 at 6:28 PM (EDT)

    To paul-
    First of all I absolutly LOVE the all american rejects, I respect your opion but do you have nothing better to do than sit around and write hundreds of comments about a band you dont like? SHUTUP!!!!

    - score is for the album

    Posted by Anonymous on Saturday, April 22, 2006 at 10:10 PM (EDT)
    My Score:

    There latest album was pretty sweet. With some pretty decent chord-work. i dont how they do it again and agian, with these awsome hits. and cutoos to there lead guitarist how is killer.Man i would kill to see them live.

    Ray Robertson

    Posted by Anonymous on Monday, April 10, 2006 at 1:44 PM (EDT)

    There a great band they rock they rock they rock eeerrrr .....

    ALL AMERICAN REJECTS!!!!!!!

    Posted by Anonymous on Thursday, April 6, 2006 at 8:43 PM (EDT)

    you is awsome!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i love you so much!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! you are the best band in the world and the lead singer hotttttttttttttttttttie

    Posted by Anonymous on Tuesday, February 14, 2006 at 8:07 PM (EST)
    My Score:

    your star isnt on the new album... maybe you didn't realize that you worded it so weird though... oh well... I think the album was amazing.. aaron? I forget what the critics name was... let's just call him aaron then... he pretty much had my opinion the whole way... I like the fact that their music is clean... although you should hear Tyson in concert... definitely NOT clean lol... well... bye

    Posted by Anonymous on Monday, February 13, 2006 at 2:26 PM (EST)
    My Score:

    Hey, I really respect The All-American Rejects and the music that they put out into the world. I think its really cool if you listen to the message behind it. And they are not sell outs! Some people just cant handle the truth behind each song they do. o, and Move along is an ausome Album! "YOUR STAR " ROCKS!!!

    Posted by Anonymous on Sunday, February 12, 2006 at 1:03 PM (EST)
    My Score:

    i think the CD is amazing. i`m going to the concert in April they are sharing with Fall Out Boy, Hawthorne Heights, From Frist to Last and 2 others... i think it will b sooooo good .. thank god i have good seats i might get to touch them haha. but seriously if anyone thinks the CD is bad... u really need to listen to the words...get a feel for them. i dont kno about you but i kno i learned alot from their CD.. and besides there a great group. they deserve the love of their fans

    Peace

    Posted by Anonymous on Friday, January 6, 2006 at 1:48 PM (EST)

    i win, ha ahhaha ahahahaha ha haha ha ah ha, sorry i can't laugh properly anymore every time i laugh cream cheese comes out, its not as sick as it sounds every time i laugh just think of john candy and what hes doing with his pocket

    thanks for the understand guys

    paul

    Posted by Anonymous on Friday, January 6, 2006 at 1:31 PM (EST)

    oh and all-american rejects are gay, nearly forgot that one

    paul

    Posted by Anonymous on Friday, January 6, 2006 at 1:29 PM (EST)

    sorry guys i haven't posted for so so long its coz i was in an accident, if if only i just didn't get in da, in da caaarr..i wouldn't be like dis, my heads all bruised and swollen it looks like john candy with a hole in his pocket wanking in public, if you can imagine that, that’s what my face looks like right now. Its all true I’m 25 years old and I live with my mom on a beach house on our own private island so it does get lonely her with mom and I, on those candle lit nights. So sorry for all the trouble guys can we just be friends?

    yours truely

    paul

    Posted by elementchic on 2005-12-16 13:50:09

    they rock!!!!!!!!!
    they like totally kick ass!!!

    Posted by Anonymous on Friday, December 16, 2005 at 1:45 PM (EST)

    they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock
    they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rockthey rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rockthey rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rockthey rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rockthey rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rockthey rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rockthey rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rockthey rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rockthey rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rockthey rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rockthey rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rockthey rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rockthey rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rockthey rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rockthey rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rockthey rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rockthey rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock they rock

    Posted by BooFace on 2005-11-18 10:12:39

    pretty original album
    120893012983x better than their first

    Posted by Anonymous on Saturday, October 22, 2005 at 4:20 PM (EDT)
    My Score:

    Yeah this album definitly have some serious potential. People always seem to pick on bands trying to write hooks. Seriously, a really good hook is WAY more harder to come up with than some 8 minute indiepop song. Tyson's vocals are fantastic, and a thousand times better than the last album.

    Now I hope that the next album will be something to grow into, something that takes a few listens to really appreciate. While I think this album is really really good and well-written, the potential (as mentioned) shown by the band should definitly be used to make some really really special and "innovative" music.

    All the best wishes to AAR

    Posted by Anonymous on Saturday, August 20, 2005 at 1:13 PM (EDT)

    The All-American Rejects ROCK! I don't care if you disagree, but this is my opinion. They're not just in it for the money, they're the real deal.

    Posted by Anonymous on Friday, August 19, 2005 at 2:16 PM (EDT)
    My Score:

    I need to get laid.

    Paul

    Posted by fall_out_girl on 2005-08-14 06:28:18
    My Score:

    oh yeah........

    Posted by fall_out_girl on 2005-08-14 06:27:59

    i think their new album rocks....i cant stop tsingin dirty little secret.....tyson is so hot, nick is so cute...their drummer's real good

    Posted by crazytoledo on 2005-08-12 13:42:03

    Welcome to the World of Idiots.

    Members: You, Me, Bush, and around 5 billion others.

    Posted by Anonymous on Tuesday, August 9, 2005 at 3:37 PM (EDT)
    My Score:

    I think that AAR is a really good band they are not EMO like other bands are. These guys are way BETTER than most of the bands out there and I'm happy for them because they are finally getting heard. the best song on their CD is "Move Along". it is fucking awesome.

    Posted by md40_07 on 2005-08-02 19:33:21

    yea i guess so...but thats about it

    Posted by crazytoledo on 2005-08-02 18:26:38

    HBB is reasonable.

    Posted by md40_07 on 2005-08-01 21:20:28

    MTV2's comercials are gay? How about the whole program?

    Posted by Anonymous on Monday, August 1, 2005 at 5:10 PM (EDT)

    Paul,

    Maybe Im mistaken, but i believe that i have seen your name about 50 times on this one post. Why spend so much time writing about a band that you consider garbage? this is what i dont get. you throw around some facts, and some speculation, and then you throw around those same facts, and that same speculation about 100 more times in case somebody in this room did not see the name paul. truth be told, i came on here to see what PEOPLE thought about the album, and all i see is you rambling on repeat. what's up with that? don't have any fiends? you sit here and pass rumors around like my 12 year old sister......oh wait.....are you my sister under another alias? that is grounds for a new topic:

    12 YEAR OLD GIRL POSES AS MENTALLY CHALLENGED GUY IN CHATROOM.

    people like you piss me off. a forum is not a place for you to try and make the friends you never had. here's an idea.....go outside.....go see REAL people.

    Posted by crazytoledo on 2005-08-01 15:47:07

    Mtv2's commericials are idiotic and why the fuck do you use a pink bump with a doll on it for a program that plays fucking metal, metalcore, and hardcore.

    Posted by crazytoledo on 2005-08-01 15:46:24

    Watching the Headbanger's Ball because I had nothing better to do when they did that, watch MTV2 Wednesday for a new, shitty video.

    Posted by Anonymous on Monday, August 1, 2005 at 3:25 PM (EDT)
    My Score:

    Ok....to all the children pretending to make points in this room. What the hell does artwork have to do with this album (if you read down you'll find that idiotic review). secondly......yes, AAR is poppy rock music, BUT THAT IS WHAT THEY ARE! They didn't exactly come onto the scene as the most hardcore of groups.

    In regards to a review that bothered me more than the others. To the person who so eloquently stated "fuck pitchfork, and commercial formula pop". What are you talking about? Are you 4 years old trying to use big words that you heard from your dad or something. dont get me wrong, im not commercial rocks biggest fan, but don't come in here and state the obvious. Say something unique that hasn't already been discussed in the same conversation. truthfully, you're being a hypocrite because your of this album was in every sense of the word.....COMMERCIAL. Think up some legitimate things to say and then post something idiot.

    Anyways, the album was alright. very catchy, but a little too whiney (i guess thats just tysons appeal). contrary to some peoples opinions, I think that Tyson is a rather good lyricist...no Chris Cornell....but not bad. i think that they have a lot of talent; they just need to work on setting a trend, not following it.They do not want to be one of those bands that releases 10 renditions of the same album. Bear in mind however that they are YOUNG, and they have a LONG way to go.

    BEST SONG: TOP OF THE WORLD

    Posted by md40_07 on 2005-07-31 18:10:43

    okay first of all, the song is not called "Your Dirty Little Secret". and second of all I didn't like the CD a lot either. but i thought it was worthy of a little bit of air space. Ohh yeah and do you remember when you dissed me for watching a program that would play a HH video??? Well what were you doing watching AAR on TV? probably the same thing i was doing watching HH...just flipping through the channels

    Posted by crazytoledo on 2005-07-30 22:51:24
    My Score:

    "Your Dirty Little Secret" wasn't catchy and I clickly changed the channel.

    The AAR = Pop Band.

    Hell, they aren't even emo.

    Posted by md40_07 on 2005-07-30 22:06:02
    My Score:

    Just bought the CD. Half the songs are pretty catchy and good and half of them I can barley listen too, but just because Dirty Little Secret is so damn addictive I will agree with the reviewer and give this 3 stars

    Posted by Anonymous on Wednesday, July 27, 2005 at 5:35 PM (EDT)
    My Score:

    You guys are fucking crazy. This albums lyrics are NOT bad. Listen to rap for five minutes. Then you'll hear something that is totally and completely SHIT.

    AAR is the most amazing band I think I've ever heard. Fuck yourself if you think anything different.

    &hearts MAM

    Posted by Anonymous on Sunday, July 24, 2005 at 10:18 PM (EDT)

    More like the All-American FAGGOTS

    HAHAHAH

    Posted by Anonymous on Sunday, July 24, 2005 at 10:17 PM (EDT)

    It baffles me that this pile of alligator shit was even reviewed and posted on PunkNews.org. What the FUCK? Jesus fly fishing christ if you listen to this shit you are a goddamn retard and need to hack your ears off with a meat cleaver because you have no use for them if you're listening to the All-American Rejects.

    Posted by Anonymous on Sunday, July 24, 2005 at 2:24 AM (EDT)
    My Score:

    LOOK AT THE ALBUM ARTWORK. its so terrible. i cant believe you people even bother to review this bullshit. I downloaded this album for free....AND THE SCORE is for THE NEW LOWS....fuck pitchfork, commercial radio and manufactured formula pop. This album has already come out a couple times a year since cavemen created the music industry.

    Posted by Anonymous on Saturday, July 23, 2005 at 8:30 PM (EDT)

    haven't heard this but i think it's how awesome that mike tyson is channeling his rage into more creative efforts.

    Posted by Anonymous on Thursday, July 21, 2005 at 10:20 PM (EDT)

    "jones the bones

    Chinatown

    Scott Heisel

    paul"

    Oh, oh, l get it!! They're all fucking lame!!!

    Posted by Anonymous on Thursday, July 21, 2005 at 9:40 PM (EDT)

    "teenage dirtbag was written by neither of them. it was written by wheatus, bitch."

    You say it like you're cooler than me for knowing that...

    Posted by stevejonestherealbones on 2005-07-21 19:40:41

    anyone else excited about what kinda arguements we can get in tonight about the new reviews? anyone? anuone?

    well i'm not, cause i have better things to do.

    the Aquabats are finally coming to my town bitches!!!!! this show is gonna be sweet, dog

    - jones the bones

    - stevejones8770@yahoo.com

    Posted by Anonymous on Thursday, July 21, 2005 at 4:14 PM (EDT)
    My Score:

    Is there any interviews with the drummer and guitarist where they openly trash the band? I gotta read it for myself.

    Posted by karasu on 2005-07-21 15:43:01

    gay.

    Posted by Anonymous on Thursday, July 21, 2005 at 3:41 PM (EDT)

    jones the bones

    Chinatown

    Scott Heisel

    paul

    Posted by Anonymous on Thursday, July 21, 2005 at 1:49 PM (EDT)

    eat.my.shorts

    paul

    Posted by Anonymous on Thursday, July 21, 2005 at 1:19 PM (EDT)
    My Score:

    I'm voting for a kick in the head for "paul." Rarely has someone who posted so much had so little to say.

    Score is for the album.

    Posted by Anonymous on Thursday, July 21, 2005 at 12:10 PM (EDT)

    i think anyone that calls fugazi "emo core" needs a kick in the balls

    Posted by Anonymous on Thursday, July 21, 2005 at 9:39 AM (EDT)

    shut your fucking mouth for the love of god. I CAN'T BEGIN TO TELL YOU HOW FUCKING MUCH I HATE IT WHEN THEY FUCKING SCENE POLICE PULL THAT FUCKING 'OH THATS NOT SCREAMO THIS IS'. you know goddamn well what i meant about the first wave of 'emocore' in reference to thrice/tbs/thursday.

    yea, NO, i'm 25 and have never heard of fugazi. yea i'm a fucking retard. I don't own end hits. its not one of my favorite records. 'foremans dog' isnt' one of my favorite songs. i wasn't listening to minor threat in 6th grade.

    i'd like to fucking beat you.

    paul

    Posted by Anonymous on Wednesday, July 20, 2005 at 11:58 PM (EDT)

    I
    hate
    all
    of
    you.

    Posted by Anonymous on Wednesday, July 20, 2005 at 11:16 PM (EDT)

    yeah two of them are in these enzymes. but in no way are they grind. its basically crusty fast paced punk with screamed vocals. like all american rejects meets..converge.

    Posted by Anonymous on Wednesday, July 20, 2005 at 8:13 PM (EDT)

    "i basically listen to everything but hardcore and super emo stuff. if its skatepunk, pop punk, powerpop, the first wave of emo core (thrice, TBS, thursday) i listen to it."

    those bands weren't the first wave of emocore, moron. maybe you've heard of rites of spring, or this band fugazi...

    Posted by Anonymous on Wednesday, July 20, 2005 at 8:13 PM (EDT)

    So their hired drummer and guitar player publicly criticizes the band's music and admits to only being in it for the money.

    >>>>>>

    Now while this seems silly with a "band" like All-American Rejects, I think that the real annoying thing is the official "hired gun" mentality.

    Because, it's basically the same thing as Bigwig. Fearless may not hire side musicians, but Tom Petta clearly IS Bigwig and he owns a majority of the band's incorporated business. He pretty much writes all of the parts and has whoever happens to be in the band at the time (it sure changes, doesn't it?) play what he tells them to, how he tells them to. Normally I wouldn't like this. And maybe it's not fun to be in Bigwig, but Tom writes goddamn amazing songs and he wants things exactly how he wants them. So, can you blame him? The albums and songs are fucking great. Imagine how much worse "Invitation to Tragedy" would have been if he had allowed the Near Miss fuckers to contribute to the songwriting process.

    Posted by Anonymous on Wednesday, July 20, 2005 at 8:06 PM (EDT)

    we've all been thinking this but it's about time someone said it.

    Hilary Duff > Black Flag

    *****************************************

    Yeah, I think that the food-chain:

    Hilary Duff > Black Flag > All American Rejects

    Is probably true, though NOT true (at least at this point, but give it time), in terms of historical significance and influential impact.

    That said, Black Flag has had over 10 times as long to establish itself among the annals of history.

    Hilary is certainly harder rocking and more legit, showing a certain collaborative ethos with her band (unlike Ginn, she appears with the same musicians on her various albums),

    Posted by Anonymous on Wednesday, July 20, 2005 at 4:58 PM (EDT)

    the lead singer is perhaps one the biggest assholes in the music industry today

    Posted by Anonymous on Wednesday, July 20, 2005 at 2:32 PM (EDT)

    did anyone know their singer used to weight like 250 when he was like early teens? yea man, he was a fatty. rumors of bulemia and coke abuse on the road may or may not have merit (he lost the weight before they ever got signed...but i've heard rumors how he keeps it off, and rumors of their extreme drinking/coke/fucking sluts habits)

    paul

    Posted by Anonymous on Wednesday, July 20, 2005 at 2:30 PM (EDT)

    "I can't get the image out of my head of their douche bag guitarist putting his foot up on the monitor, getting in classic rock stance, eye balling the ladies and then breaking out a 4 barre chord progression. No solo, no cool riff, a shitty run through the chord progression. You can't stand on the monitor and get in Slash position to play some pussy ass chords...that is all you need to know about this band"

    now THAT was classic

    paul

    Posted by swingline on 2005-07-20 13:48:18

    rumor has it the lead singer is actually amanda pete.

    Posted by Anonymous on Wednesday, July 20, 2005 at 12:39 PM (EDT)

    Thier label didn't hire the drummer and guitarist. They knew them already from other bands in Oklahoma City, mainly Euclid Crash and Leasing Nations. And yes, they do think the band sucks.

    Posted by SoupIsGoodFood on 2005-07-20 11:21:23
    My Score:

    Score is for the comments in this thread. I'm laughing so hard.

    Posted by Anonymous on Wednesday, July 20, 2005 at 11:12 AM (EDT)

    Aren't some of these guys in the grind band These Enzymes...or am I wrong

    Posted by sfbarker on 2005-07-20 10:26:21
    My Score:

    This is probably the worst band I've EVER seen.

    I can't get the image out of my head of their douche bag guitarist putting his foot up on the monitor, getting in classic rock stance, eye balling the ladies and then breaking out a 4 barre chord progression. No solo, no cool riff, a shitty run through the chord progression. You can't stand on the monitor and get in Slash position to play some pussy ass chords...that is all you need to know about this band.

    Posted by Anonymous on Wednesday, July 20, 2005 at 9:18 AM (EDT)

    You are all aware about how their label made them re-write the record to be 'poppier' and 'more catchy' right? Just checkign that this is common knowledge.

    I did enjoy their first one at the time a few years ago. This is much more overproduced and was written to meet a labels expectatins. thats about as dishonest as an album can get.

    paul

    Posted by Anonymous on Wednesday, July 20, 2005 at 1:45 AM (EDT)

    The hold steady was just on Conan. It was uber rocking.

    Posted by Anonymous on Wednesday, July 20, 2005 at 12:16 AM (EDT)

    This album still is better than their piece of crap old one. Sure, they'll be gone ina few years, but dont take shit like this seriouslly. Burn, listen for a month, throw away. Stop taking shit like this as on the same level as Black Flag and stuff like that.

    Use your fucking mind dicks.

    Posted by Anonymous on Tuesday, July 19, 2005 at 11:51 PM (EDT)

    wow you beat me to the comment

    Posted by Anonymous on Tuesday, July 19, 2005 at 11:50 PM (EDT)

    teenage dirtbag was written by neither of them. it was written by wheatus, bitch.

    Posted by Anchors on 2005-07-19 23:47:05

    "Wait were THESE the guys that wrote "Teenage Dirtbag" or was that American Hi-Fi?"

    Nah dude, that was Wheatus. American Hi-fi was "Flavor Of The Weak."

    Posted by Anonymous on Tuesday, July 19, 2005 at 11:35 PM (EDT)

    all american rejects > the lawrence arms

    Posted by Anonymous on Tuesday, July 19, 2005 at 11:31 PM (EDT)
    My Score:

    Wait were THESE the guys that wrote "Teenage Dirtbag" or was that American Hi-Fi?

    Posted by RondoMondo on 2005-07-19 22:29:41

    When your label hires your bandmates how could you even feel like there's truth behind your music?

    Posted by TheNightProwler on 2005-07-19 22:29:35
    My Score:

    Wow, I just find it hilarious now how this reviewer's other 2 reviews are Fugazi and Jawbreaker.... and in the Jawbreaker review he insults Fat Wreck and Epitaph for not having any DIY ethics.

    Is this another joke person like with that Warped Tour review?

    Posted by Anonymous on Tuesday, July 19, 2005 at 10:12 PM (EDT)

    "Hilary Duff > The All-American Rejects"

    Is there any need to state the obvious like that? Anybody who disagrees is clearly under the age of 12 or completely retarded.

    Posted by swingline on 2005-07-19 21:47:32

    we've all been thinking this but it's about time someone said it.

    Hilary Duff > Black Flag

    Posted by ChokingVictim on 2005-07-19 19:41:07
    My Score:

    How can anybody say this is catchy?

    The first album, maybe. But this is just terrible.

    Well, they are both terrible.

    But, score is for "Full Throttle" by the Blue Meanies. I'm listening to it for the first time in ages - I forgot how good it is.

    Posted by Anonymous on Tuesday, July 19, 2005 at 7:09 PM (EDT)

    Hilary Duff > The All-American Rejects

    Posted by Anonymous on Tuesday, July 19, 2005 at 6:35 PM (EDT)
    My Score:

    If you seriously listen to this garbage I want to kick you in the head and then laugh in your face. Give this band 5 years and no one will even remember them. Complete trash.

    Posted by TheNightProwler on 2005-07-19 17:42:59
    My Score:

    I was more referencing on hearing people say how some of the members of the band don't even like the music they play.

    Posted by Anonymous on Tuesday, July 19, 2005 at 5:33 PM (EDT)

    "
    Haha that's hilarious! Don't a few of the members of Sugarcult do the same thing?

    But in actuality that's pretty sad that this album is being reviewed here then..."

    how much money could the dudes in Sugarcult possibly be making? i didnt realize they still had fans...its not like they ever made it to a major

    Posted by Anonymous on Tuesday, July 19, 2005 at 5:13 PM (EDT)
    My Score:

    ok i'm going to be totally unbiased about the actual music, because everything about this band's attitude, marketing, etc. is totally wrong. dirty little secret is fucking terrible, i enjoyed almost every song for at least a couple months on their debut but i didn't even listen to this song all the way through. "move along" and "it ends tonight" are above average pop songs and even though i hate to admit it, i can't stop listening to "move along". the rest of the album is total shit though. i've listened to it at least 3 times through and absolutely nothing else sticks out.so with 2 good songs, a few horrible ones, a few boring ones, and a few average ones, this album doesn't deserve more than a 3.

    Posted by Anonymous on Tuesday, July 19, 2005 at 5:12 PM (EDT)

    its true man! its all true!

    paul

    Posted by dazed on 2005-07-19 16:50:18

    Also while it's kind of despicable to play crap and admit to being in it for the money you have to admit it really is in better taste than someone who actually likes the crappy music they play.

    Posted by dazed on 2005-07-19 16:48:42

    Their first album is sickening

    Posted by Crookedsuperhero on 2005-07-19 16:43:42

    Well Paul, it seems when every sub-par pop album comes up on here i can always expect you to call it your guilty pleasure.

    Posted by TheNightProwler on 2005-07-19 16:39:16
    My Score:

    So their hired drummer and guitar player publicly criticizes the band's music and admits to only being in it for the money.

    Haha that's hilarious! Don't a few of the members of Sugarcult do the same thing?

    But in actuality that's pretty sad that this album is being reviewed here then...

    Posted by Anonymous on Tuesday, July 19, 2005 at 4:07 PM (EDT)

    haha jones the bones is a cunt. I like this.

    Posted by Anonymous on Tuesday, July 19, 2005 at 1:58 PM (EDT)

    lmfao. i so got owned, cuz its so true. i listen to Fall out boy, mest, new found glory and these guys

    paul

    ....on the brightside though, i do own 3 dillenger 4 albums, bad religeon, lawrence arms, social D, all that stuff.

    i basically listen to everything but hardcore and super emo stuff. if its skatepunk, pop punk, powerpop, the first wave of emo core (thrice, TBS, thursday) i listen to it.

    Posted by Crookedsuperhero on 2005-07-19 13:16:32

    Paul: When every album you listen to is a "guilty pleasure", it's time to admit you have a bad taste in music and even you know it.

    Posted by Anonymous on Tuesday, July 19, 2005 at 12:06 PM (EDT)

    Black Flag is horrible.

    The All American Rejects are okay.

    Posted by Anonymous on Tuesday, July 19, 2005 at 11:52 AM (EDT)

    "black flag>all american rejects"

    Is there any need to state the obvious like that? Anybody who disagrees is clearly under the age of 12 or completely retarded.

    Posted by Anonymous on Tuesday, July 19, 2005 at 11:43 AM (EDT)

    black flag>all american rejects

    Posted by Anonymous on Tuesday, July 19, 2005 at 11:41 AM (EDT)

    "yes, I care. I love all types of music. Ranging from Shai Hulud to this. And as far as overly poppy stuff goes, I really enjoy the all american rejects. All you stuck up scenesters who say pop punk sucks before they listen can kiss my ass. Get off your high horse, stop acting so serious, throw this album in and learn to just be happy and listen to some simple and good pop."

    Wow, I rarely post here but that has to be the stupidest fucking comment I've ever read on this site. Buddy, you seriously need to just die. People as fucking retarded as you shouldn't be allowed to access the internet. Fuck you asshole.

    Posted by Anonymous on Tuesday, July 19, 2005 at 9:48 AM (EDT)
    My Score:

    I'll admit, their first album was a guilty pleasure of mine back in summer 2003 or whatever...it was so cheesey but so catchy that I loved it w/ the exception of a few duds.

    This album though is
    A. waaaaaay to overproduced. sounds like good charlotte's 'the young and the hopeless' sonically. they got a real drummer this time around, but the production makes it sound like fake drums anyway (just like that gc record, even though it was josh freese on drums)

    B.waaaaay to overdramatic. 'it ends tonight' is so fuckin' over the top. and that 'hard' song , track 6, is so terrible. i'd rather here american hi-fi's 'geeks get the girls' its that bad

    C. it just lacks sincereity. as corny as the first one was, it WAS an honest album. the production was lo fi, it was a couple of dudes barely out of highschool writing songs w/o a label backing them, then getting on tiny doghouse records. it was sincere. this album sounds like a label pleaser, written for the cash...i guess being 20 years old and having a platinum debut record can do that to you.

    I dont' know...maybe i've just outgrown them over the past 2 years (cant' remember the last time i busted out their first album anyway), and i've always hated over the top production.

    paul

    Posted by Anonymous on Tuesday, July 19, 2005 at 9:24 AM (EDT)
    My Score:

    i enjoyed thier first full length a fair deal
    it's so catchy
    and i enjoy that
    although this album is musical diarreha

    Posted by Anonymous on Tuesday, July 19, 2005 at 9:15 AM (EDT)
    My Score:

    I want a new face to face cd, get back together trevor and bring chad with you-oldpunker-

    Posted by rkl on 2005-07-19 09:13:15

    The All-American Rejects - Move Along
    Posted by Anonymous on 2005-07-19 00:23:40

    yes, I care. I love all types of music. Ranging from Shai Hulud to this. And as far as overly poppy stuff goes, I really enjoy the all american rejects. All you stuck up scenesters who say pop punk sucks before they listen can kiss my ass.


    it is possible to enjoy pop punk and still find the all american rejects to be garbage. its called discerning music tastes.

    Posted by Anonymous on Tuesday, July 19, 2005 at 9:00 AM (EDT)

    what is wrong with the music industry today?

    next review I read about a band like this and I kill myself.

    Posted by threechordsandthetruth on 2005-07-19 06:47:36

    Calling these guys 'power pop' is an insult to bands that actually are. Go check out the Exploding Hearts.

    Posted by Anonymous on Tuesday, July 19, 2005 at 6:37 AM (EDT)

    Sorry, I know a lot of people are into this band, but I fucking hate their dopey asses! The singer sounds so damn whiny when he sings, they blow!

    Posted by gladimnotemo on 2005-07-19 06:29:40

    Not surprised that this was reviewed. Grammar in the morning!

    Posted by gladimnotemo on 2005-07-19 06:29:22

    Not surprised this was reviewed.

    Posted by Anonymous on Tuesday, July 19, 2005 at 3:51 AM (EDT)

    "What was their first album like?"

    Their first album was sickeningly catchy.

    Posted by Anonymous on Tuesday, July 19, 2005 at 3:13 AM (EDT)

    Is this even worth reviewing?

    I'm willing to bet a band like Why Not has more artistic integrity than this. At least they're keeping it underground.

    This band just wants money bags. That's supposed to be cool. It's supposed to be cool these days to only care about being a band for money.

    I can't believe anyone expects anything from young assholes who believe that.

    -BSD

    Posted by Anonymous on Tuesday, July 19, 2005 at 3:09 AM (EDT)

    What was their first album like?

    Posted by Anonymous on Tuesday, July 19, 2005 at 3:09 AM (EDT)

    "Time Stands Still" and "The Last Song" from their self titled are some of the catchiest songs you will ever find.

    I don't plan on making any sort of effort to listen to this, however.

    Posted by Cheesetits on 2005-07-19 03:00:52

    Their first album was sickeningly catchy.

    Posted by Anonymous on Tuesday, July 19, 2005 at 3:00 AM (EDT)

    Their first album was sickeningly catchy.

    Posted by Anonymous on Tuesday, July 19, 2005 at 1:55 AM (EDT)

    this is me not giving a damn.

    Posted by swingline on 2005-07-19 01:48:37

    i didn't hate their first album. i played it a few times but this new one is piss over shit. i was only planning on playing the record once but i got bored after 3 songs then decided to take a shit instead. i didn't really have to take a shit i just wanted to read a magazine.

    Posted by CellarDoor on 2005-07-19 01:20:23

    Great artwork. Really inspiring.

    Posted by Anonymous on Tuesday, July 19, 2005 at 1:11 AM (EDT)

    dirty little secret

    the only dirty little secret i care about is the one with ex hippos members

    http://dirtylittlesecret.biz/

    Posted by Anonymous on Tuesday, July 19, 2005 at 1:08 AM (EDT)

    nope, jones the bones rules.

    Posted by maverick on 2005-07-19 00:44:07
    My Score:

    Not as good as the first record, but still a decent summer disc.

    -Scott

    Posted by Psychoos231 on 2005-07-19 00:43:31

    Hot damn UP DA PUNX!

    Posted by kirbypuckett on 2005-07-19 00:42:13

    I'll admit, I'm a sucker for this.

    - Kirby

    Posted by Big_Guy on 2005-07-19 00:31:56

    this shit blows

    Posted by Anonymous on Tuesday, July 19, 2005 at 12:31 AM (EDT)

    jones the bones is a fucking faggot.

    Posted by TheMarc on 2005-07-19 00:29:34
    My Score:

    I cannot stop listening to "Move Along". Someone save me!

    Posted by stevejonestherealbones on 2005-07-19 00:28:48

    oh wow, all kinds of music...from shai hulud to all american rejects...wow such a wide range.....

    seriously...like, you listen to everything from ...hard rock to pop rock...wow

    - jones the bones

    - stevejones8770@yahoo.com

    Posted by Anonymous on Tuesday, July 19, 2005 at 12:23 AM (EDT)

    yes, I care. I love all types of music. Ranging from Shai Hulud to this. And as far as overly poppy stuff goes, I really enjoy the all american rejects. All you stuck up scenesters who say pop punk sucks before they listen can kiss my ass. Get off your high horse, stop acting so serious, throw this album in and learn to just be happy and listen to some simple and good pop.

    Posted by primeevil7 on 2005-07-19 00:19:01

    Quick poll: Does anyone care?