The Static Age - Neon Nights Electric Lives (Cover Artwork)
Staff Review

The Static Age

Neon Nights Electric Lives (2004)

Tarantulas


Perhaps what's most disappointing in an album is when you finish listening to it, and nothing sticks in your head; nothing makes any impression. It's not boring per se, but it's just uninteresting. It's something that you might expect as background music in a bad sitcom or soap opera. And that's exactly what the Static Age has to offer.

Believe me, I've heard much worse. Much, much worse. But this just sounds like a wussy version of a nü-emo band, or a crappy extension of a crappy new wave band. It's all just a shitfest, no matter how you look at it. Whatever seems interesting is only because it reminds you of something from some 80's band that you have nostalgia for.

I mean, we're talking Phil Collins, Peter Gabriel, Big Country, and Thompson Twins. The guitar sound is ripped straight off from The Edge from U2, and the bass is recorded with a silly modulation. And it goes nowhere. The breathy vocals are just over the top and the lyrics are equally ridiculous. The last two songs are remixes of previous tracks to make them sound more electronic like Depeche Mode. Or some silly Postal Service rip-off.

Fat chicks with too much black eyeliner are going to be stoked about this record for years.