The Burning Season - The Haze Of Infatuation (Cover Artwork)
Staff Review

The Burning Season

The Haze Of Infatuation (2005)

Hand Of Hope

There are a few things wrong with this release. First off, no zombies on the cover. I mean, c'mon. Zombies. They're sweet. Sure there's this mud man, or whatever, but he's not a zombie. Maybe a golem at best, and Akimbo's Elephantine has the best golem cover ever. Second, there's this weird happy melodic part to the end of the first song that's super posi-sounding, but they still do their Cookie Monster vocals over it. Third, the reverb on the snare brings back fond memories of The Boss' Born In The USA, yet it doesn't do a metalcore band justice. And finally, the entire album is a dragging breakdown, basically. While "The Eternal Now" starts out mid-tempo, it soon slows down and the tempo is maintained all the way through the first four tracks until "Pick Up the Pieces" comes in fast for about twenty seconds of the forty-two second song. "Year Of The Cicada" sounds waaaaay too much like a Godsmack song. "Losing My Voice" is a way too emo acoustic instrumental. And the record finishes with more of the same. Heavy thudding breakdowns with no up-tempo parts.

I guess the best way to describe this album is to imagine that you are being chased by a very fat man. Or woman. Whatever, no gender bias here. So right away their weight builds momentum and they're off after you like a rocket, thundering down the sidewalk. And it's exciting! And scary! I mean, they can sit on you, or maybe they're going to try to eat you! Anyway, after thirty seconds, they've slowed down horribly. Sure, they're still hitting the sidewalk with their feet just as heavy, and the world is shaking underneath their pounding. You let up a bit, relieved that your safety is now guaranteed, but after a few minutes, he/she/it is still chasing you and you're getting bored. I mean, you can't stop for fear of being eaten, but by now, you're just walking. He/she/it is getting very sweaty and tired, but then it gets a second wind! It's chasing you again! Oh, but now he/she/it has stopped. Other people on the sidewalk are confused and disturbed by the sight. You're even more bored than after the first speed burst. Eventually it stops – either from cardiac arrest or it saw a donut shop – and you feel even more relieved. You're glad you have an interesting story, but you don't feel like being chased by a fat person down the sidewalk ever again.

I guess this band used to be known as Worlds Apart, but that doesn't help them out in my camp. You might dig on this, I won't judge you. But I'm pretty sure that I am not sexually aroused by them, and that's never a good sign. You should always walk away from good heavy music with an enormous erection. Because that shows how tough you are. Then you go to the tattoo shop and get tribal symbols or barbed wire tattoo across your biceps. Me? I've got a potato on my ankle. See if you can catch that reference.