Pandas - Maximum Fucking Tenderness (Cover Artwork)
Staff Review

Pandas

Pandas: Maximum Fucking Tenderness

Maximum Fucking Tenderness (2008)

self-released


2.5
Describing what Pandas do on their Maximum Fucking Tenderness EP is as difficult as one might guess from such a name, release title and cover art (which has nothing to do with actual pandas). Let's try it, though: spazzy rock with minor flashes of grind-y/tech-y metallic hardcore? Kind of. These ...

Describing what Pandas do on their Maximum Fucking Tenderness EP is as difficult as one might guess from such a name, release title and cover art (which has nothing to do with actual pandas). Let's try it, though: spazzy rock with minor flashes of grind-y/tech-y metallic hardcore? Kind of.

These guys can play their instruments, sure, but the way they combine everything–from strained singing/scratchy yelps to riddled double-bass fills and finger-tapping/painfully screechy guitars–just feels awfully disjointed and directionless. These four songs just don't really go anywhere.

"The Predator's Barm Is Arming" opens with a random grind thrust out of Daughters' playbook circa Canada Songs before the track tries more melodic, spastic grounds, and then goes with some violent stop-start guitars that seem to go for a Dillinger Escape Plan thing but sound more like Finch's "The Casket of Roderic Usher". There's more interesting, gyrating rhythmic stuff happening in closer "Thundercougarfalconbird" before it goes into generic metallic mosh pummeling, while the rest of this EP still doesn't coalesce with itself that sensibly.

This EP was released over two years ago, so Pandas have probably smoothed out their iffy tendencies by now. Let's hope.

STREAM
Maximum Fucking Tenderness EP