Seemless - Seemless [reissue] (Cover Artwork)
Staff Review

Seemless

Seemless: Seemless [reissue]

Seemless [reissue] (2005)

Equal Vision


0.5
Whoa! This shit sounds like a modern rock band! Scratch that, it sounds exactly like Stone Temple Pilots or Soundgarden done by a shitty modern rock band. I mean, I honestly can't even take it. I know Equal Vision is a shitty trend-riding label, but this is probably the worst album I've ever heard i...

Whoa! This shit sounds like a modern rock band! Scratch that, it sounds exactly like Stone Temple Pilots or Soundgarden done by a shitty modern rock band. I mean, I honestly can't even take it. I know Equal Vision is a shitty trend-riding label, but this is probably the worst album I've ever heard in my life. And that means a lot coming from me.

The album is chock full of wailing Chris Cornell/Scott Weiland vocals. Enough to make me sick. Intercut are half-ass attempts at stoner rock riffs. You can tell that these guys had their mind blown by Queens Of The Stone Age's R. And by that, I mean they listened to it once and said, "Ooooh, let's try to sound like that, at least a little bit!" Congratulations, you have formed a band bankrupt of any originality or credibility. I'm sure when you get signed to a major label that doesn't care about you and throws you into the heap of the hundred of shitty bands you emulate poorly you'll truly feel at home. Sweet Jesus, there's enough drop D on this album to give any nü-metal fan a hard-on.

I don't even know why I'm reviewing this album. Despite the record label, this is just major label modern rock nü-metal fodder. Another clone band. Fuck, I was being too nice to them with Soundgarden and Stone Temple Pilots. It sounds like Velvet Revolver. And we all know how much Duff McKagan sucks when he's not wearing a TSOL shirt.

This is honestly a release that I've had to stop 10-12 times while listening to it because I just couldn't take it anymore. Good God, they even spell their name wrong like a shitty nü-metal band. And you know what? I bet thousands of you chumpmonkeys are going to lap this vomit up like honey because it's on Equal Vision. Well fuck you, and fuck this band.

With Equal Vision behind them and an army of powerful new songs in its arsenal, Seemless are firing on all cylinders and show no signs of stopping or slowing down until they bring their honest, feisty rock to the ears of everyone smart enough to listen."
Not if I can help it.