April Fools! Eat Fresh!
by

So it's past noon `round here so we'll pull back the curtain on this one. I'm not particularly interested in seeing just how litigious Doctor's Associates is anyways. Click below to see our past year's jokes. Here's the original headline:

Punknews and Subway launch "Break Up? Eat Fresh!" Punknews.org is thrilled to announce a new partnership with popular multinational sandwich franchise Subway and the launch of our "Break Up? Eat Fresh!" campaign.

Regular Punknews readers will have frequently seen comments like "sandwich time!" or "I'm going to get a sandwich!" as a means of trivializing the break-up of an unliked band. The meme, inadvertently started by an editor in September of 2002, has become so popular that it reached the boardroom of the Milford, Connecticut-based sandwich kings. In a statement company president Fred De Luca commented "most advertising requires you to entice potential customers into your establishment, but here's a case where the customer's hungry, they're passionate, they have no regard for punctuation, and they're screaming out for a meal. You can't buy opportunities like this."

The pilot project linking the music news moguls and the restaurants kicks off today, April 1st. Whenever a band breaks up, print out the Punknews article announcing the split and bring it to any of the company's over 27,200 locations for a free 6 inch sub with the purchase of a large drink (some conditions apply - only valid on the date the article was posted - not valid in Quebec). Furthermore, Punknews.org will feature spokesman Jared Fogle in an upcoming series of articles detailing how a sandwich with 6 grams of fat (or less!) plus a night out slamming in the mosh pit is a great way to get in shape.

Past Fools:

2006 - Confusing meta "the joke is that there was no joke but we'll say there was" joke
2005 - Horse The Band signs to East/West
2004 - Tim Armstrong co-writes new Avril Lavigne album
2003 - Fat Mike joins the Foo Fighers
2002 - Columbia Records buys Punknews.org
2001 - Sony buys Epitaph
2000 - We actually didn't post any stories at all, news or otherwise.
That happened a lot back in the early days. I guess it's funny.