Kreayshawn - Somethin' 'Bout Kreay' (Cover Artwork)


Somethin' 'Bout Kreay' (2012)

Columbia Records

Being an Internet sensation can't be easy, but when you have swag pumping out of your ovaries, the world is yours. just ask Kreayshawn a.k.a. Baby Kreay a.k.a. the Queen Of Swag a.k.a. the Holy Swagmother. The amount of swag on display on Somethin' 'Bout Kreay' is fucking insane. If you don't like fun, partying, blunts, 40s of Olde English or swag, then go listen to your Propagandhi albums because this is not for you.

From the second "Blase Blase" kicks off you are in a world of swag, blunts, 40s and oh, did I mention swag? Kreay's got the swaggiest beats, and the swaggiest rhymes. The song is far from being as swagtastic as The Holy Swagmothers first single, and YouTube giant "Gucci Gucci," but as with a lot of this album, it's much more poppy than it is hip-hop. Obviously, the Dutchess of Swag has one thing on her mind, and it's not haters, it's getting money. The song is so ridiculously catchy and swagerific that it should be her next single.

"Gucci Gucci", in case you've been living under a rock, is Baby Kreay's slam at basic bitches and modern fashion, which is pretty punk rock. It's also the song in which Her Royal Swagness claims that she's "got the swag and it's pumpin out my ovaries." This song is so fucking catchy that since it's dropped in 2010, I've gone from hating it to listening to it daily.

It's a shame that this got released in the middle of September because I'd love to blast "Summertime" while I'm swaggin' out, smoking hella swishers and drinking malt liquor. Basically all this song is about is it being summertime, and your bitch being on Kreay's mind. V-Nasty has a swagged out verse, but she still can't hold a candle to the Holy Swagmother.

On "Left Ey3" Kreay-Kreay pays tribute to both Left Eye Lopez of TLC and Amy Winehouse. Kreay says she's about to "burn this mother fucker down like I'm Left Eye." This is clearly a song about some dumb ass who did the Swagmother wrong and to say in the least Baby Kreay is not stoked on it. She also drops such swagtastic rhymes as "I don't need no TLC / All I need is THC / Higher than Miss Courtney Love / Murder in the first degree."

"BFF (Bestfriend)" is a tribute to Kreay's BFF, who obviously isn't a basic bitch. This song is so catchy that it hurts. It's the poppiest song on the record, and has almost zero rapping, it's still fucking great and is one of the swaggiest pop songs ever. It's just about kicking it with your friend and smokin' doobies and doing whatever you like. "Twerkin!!!" is about exactly what you'd expect; it's a beautiful song about just loving dat booty. Diplo is featured on this track, and he is the only bad thing about it. Dude has absolutely zero swag and is just annoying.

"Go Hard (La.La.La.)" is the leadoff single off of the album and it is so swagerific it hurts. If you listen to this song and don't have it stuck in your head for days on end, then I envy you. Though one thing that I noticed in this song is that Baby Kreay likes to talk mad shit on where basic bitches work. On this she raps "Hey bitch, I see you workin' at the mall / At Forever 21 selling tanks and shawls" and on, "Gucci Gucci," "Bitch you ain't no Barbie / I see you work at Arby's / Number 2, super size, hurry up, I'm starving." Her Royal Swagness does not appreciate hard work because, lets be honest, that's not how one obtains swag.

From there we hear "The Ruler" and "Love Haus." "The Ruler" reminds me of late '80s Def Jam, and is just as swaggy as ever other song on the record. "Love Haus" is another poppy track, in the vein of "Summertime" and "BFF;" it's not quite as swagtastic as those two songs but it reminds me of Lady Gaga, which is pretty fucking swagerific.

In closing, I'd just like to say that Kreayshawn is the punkest, swaggiest, non-basic bitch doing it today. Sorry Lil' Debbie, but Kreay is the rap game Mona Lisa, masterpiece. This is such a promising release from a swaggy young artist. I'm so stoked for her and her career. Swag on Kreayshawn.